Silent_bob's Forum Posts | Swinging Heaven

Join the most popular community of UK swingers now

silent_bob

Over 90 days ago

Straight Male, 50

United Kingdom

Profile Follows

Meets Parties Stories

Forum

16 Aug 2005

Personally I think you can overdo safe sex - I saw the same post and had much the same reaction to it.
It basically boils down to relative degrees of risk, and what you consider 'safe enough'. There's a whole swathe of very dangerous diseases that you might pick up walking past somebody in the street, but there aren't many people prepared to walk around in rubber suits carrying their own air supply.

16 Aug 2005

Hello and :welcome:
It's not quite Scotland, but if you ever find yourself on Tyneside, then feel free to look me up.
wave

wave

15 Aug 2005

I think MISSCHIEF has hit the nail on the head here:

Quote by MISSCHIEF
Are you happy to face the consequenses if your husband finds out about this meet you're thinking of having?

Having been in a similar situation to you I spent a lot of time considering whether or not it was a good idea to go behind my wife's back, and in the end I decided to talk about it before I did anything. This is definitely a situation where it's better to ask for approval (or at least aquiesence) in advance rather than forgiveness after the fact. In my case my wife was very happy that I'd been able to trust her not to blow a gasket, and is now confident that I'm not about to run off with a nineteen year old leggy blond. smile

smile

15 Aug 2005

Quote by steve_j
Team Fortress Classic

Team Fortress hmm now that takes me back
I know the feeling, played it 'till about mid 2003 when I discovered the Natural Selection HL mod, then got seduced by Battlefield 1942, Battlefield Vietnam, and now the BF2 demo.

15 Aug 2005

I was glad to see this thread as I'd seriously pondered starting one of my own.
I chose my current username on here because I was using it on a couple of other sites and I can only remember so many username/password combinations. To be honest I think it's crap and I'd like to change it ASAP, but I've no idea what to change it to.
I do have another online nickname, that I've been using for about five years, starting off as my handle for online Team Fortress Classic. I'd be tempted to use it here if it wasn't readily identifiable as me through Google (my Mum knows what it is as she reads my Livejournal, and I'd really rather not explain the details of my marriage to her, even if my wife and I are perfectly comfortable with it).

15 Aug 2005

Quote by Smoking Muff
You should try the trouser with the button flies. Just nice to slip a finger in and find out if they are shaved or hairy :smile2:

Hmm, I'd not thought of that. I might have to buy a couple of pairs.

15 Aug 2005

This sounds oddly familiar, though in my case it was ridiculous hangovers rather than blackouts and UDIs (Unidentified Drinking Injuries - where you wake up thinking 'Ouch, how did I do that?').
Personally, I went from a regular heavy drinker to practically teetotal overnight with very little difficulty apart from gaining an addiction to tea (up to a gallon a day at times). My decision to give up booze was mainly based on the fact that I don't think there's a lot of point drinking alcohol unless you intend to get drunk. These days I have a very occasional pint of shandy or possibly a single small glass of wine, and even then I'm such a lightweight that two pints of shandy is enough to get me (an eighteen stone bloke) noticably tipsy. redface

redface

Turning to more practical suggestions - have you ever tried going out and not drinking any alcohol? I always found it easier to stay completely sober than to rely on my willpower after a couple of drinks, and although it's initially quite odd to be the sober one in a group it can also be quite interesting - you'll be the one with a perfect memory of the previous evening's events.

14 Aug 2005

Definitely boxers - briefs end up riding up my ample arse, and going commando chafes far too much, not to mention the increased risk of a serious zip injury :cry:

14 Aug 2005

Hi all
Just got back from my holidays in Scotland, with a surprisingly good tan and astonishingly few midge bites (I wasn't unscathed, but got off very lightly). biggrin

biggrin

We had a leisurely trip up to Fort William by train, then picked up a yacht for the week and did the length of the Caledonian Canal and back. I ate huge amounts of very good food, and fulfilled a long standing ambition to try a deep-fried, battered haggis (very pleasant). I even got to go Dolphin watching in the Moray Firth, but didn't spot any :cry: .
So, please expect my inane wittering to continue in much the same vein as before I disappeared a couple of weeks ago.

14 Aug 2005

I was just about to write an almost identical post, but having seen this one I'll simply add my comment to this one.
I sail as much as I can, which is about once a year on a hired boat at the moment. I'm currently working out which dinghy to build first so I can get some regular sailing in. I'm based in South Shields, which means I'm about as far from you as it's possible to be without being in Scotland (where I've just spent a week on a yacht on the Caledonian Canal - not much sailing but a good holiday).

2 Aug 2005

I think the decision to list a top 5 is somewhat arbitary, especialy when the general concensus seems to be that hugging anyone who wants one is generally a good thing. biggrin

biggrin

Top of my list would probably have to be fabio as he's likely to be the person to decide that I'm allowed to come along.
Next is probably DreamerHelen as she's such a pleasant and supportive person.
After that I think it'd decend into a bit of a free-for-all/group hug with any and all willing participants. wink

wink

1 Aug 2005

I know I've been around for a month or so and chatted to a few people on here, but I realised I'd completely forgotten to write an introductory post. The timing couldn't possily be any worse, as I'm going to be AFK for the next couple of weeks while I go sailing in Scotland, but what the hell.
I'm 28, male, and very happily married to the love of my life, who knows exactly what I'm doing here and gives her full blessing. biggrin

biggrin

I'm a computer geek, of the Linux sysadmin variety - I can normally be found hunched over a keyboard or with my head stuck inside a recalcitrant server. :censored: When I'm not attempting to subvert the world's technology to my command, I go sailing, build boats (or at least think about which boat to build), blow things up in first-person shoot-em-up games, and make scale model aircraft (before anyone thinks about taking the piss I'd like to point out that patience, manual dexterity, and attention to detail are all transferable skills :twisted: ).
I'm definitely sapiosexual - I fancy people's minds far more than I do their bodies (though I'm a great fan of the human form, especially the female of the species, in all it's myriad variations). Having just come out with that last sentence, it's probably fair to warn people that I normally sound like I've swallowed a dictionary and have an opinion on most things apart from football and Big Brother.
Anyway, that's probably enough to be going on with (and I'm knackered), so I think I'll finish up now. I look forward to chatting with you guys after I get back from my holidays.

1 Aug 2005

Quote by smokerjim
OK, I'll be the mug.....Beef Bayonet, Mutton Musket, Lamb Cannon, Tummy Truncheon, Belly Banana

We've barely even started, what about:
yoghurt-spitting womb ferret
porridge cannon
meat & two veg
spam dagger
purple-helmet warrior
trouser trout
little red rooster
'my lemon' - one for the Led Zeppelin/Robert Johnson fans, in fact 'Johnson' is another one
and many, many more...
Personally I tend to refer to it as the old chap or my tackle. Undercarriage is a term reserved for when they've been involuntarily used as a load-bearing structure. :cry:

1 Aug 2005

Quote by easyease
im glad it worked out bhd. seems like karma paid you back nicely for being honest with your mrs.

To be fair, I really shouldn't have been anything like as worried. We've always been able to resolve any differences by reasoned discussion, it's one of the reasons I decided to marry her. biggrin

biggrin

1 Aug 2005

Quote by easyease
do you think its cheating if a single bi guy fooled around with a married one?

As others have already commented, if you have sex with somebody behind your partners back, of whatever gender, then you're cheating.
Having said that, from personal experience I know it can take a lot of guts to bring the subject up, and it's very easy to decide to duck the issue 'till the 'right time'. I admit that I've been looking for meets and indeed even been active on these forums before I'd had that particular conversation, but it wasn't long after I first got a reply that I realised that there was no way in hell I could ever cheat on my wife, so I broached the subject with her.
Fortunately it proved to be possibly the best conversation we've ever had. It helps that we've been together for five and a half years and in every other respect apart from sex we could only be described as soul mates. We've also both got a background in biology, which definitely helped me try to explain the situation we were in as I saw it - that when it comes to sex drive we're at completely opposite ends of the spectrum. It turns out that she was convinced I'd end up having an affair at some point and when I mentioned the idea of swinging she agreed that it was the safest way (both mentally and physically) to solve our one relatively minor issue and allow us to get on with enjoying life.
I'll stop rambling now, though I should probably thank everyone on these forums for their previous posts, as reading through some of the older threads on here was very helpful in persuading me that being open and honest was the only sensible course of action.

1 Aug 2005

Fair enough mate, glad you enjoyed yourself. smile

smile

31 Jul 2005

Sounds like a good plan to me.

29 Jul 2005

Hi Sean, not sure if I'm still considered too new, but if not (or if you're happy to review the situation closer to the event) I'd love to come along and put a few faces to names. smile

smile

Incidentally, I'm probably going to be dropping offline for a couple of weeks or so (holiday sailing on the Caledonian Canal), so don't be surprised if I suddenly go silent in the next day or two, but normal service wil be resumed around the middle of August.

29 Jul 2005

Quote by naughtynymphos1
One for the Brummies on here - on the grass next to the small ornamental lake in Aston University's grounds, at about 9 o'clock at night in late summer (around dusk). I think about half a dozen people must have wandered past no more than 10 feet from my naked arse bobbing up and down.
I seem to have an occasional urge to do some fairly risky things, another one (though not sexual in nature) involved smoking a herbal cigarette whilst standing on top of the customs & excise office in St. Peter Port, Guernsey.

bloody hell man theres a swingers club in aston ffs couldn't u have waited 10 mins and gone there lol

lol

I was 21 and hadn't heard about swingers clubs, it was a spur of the moment thing in between a few pints in the Pot O' Beer and getting up to some moderately naughty things in a dark corner of Edward's No. 8, besides the lass I was with was really into sex in risky places. There was nobody about for around 15 minutes before we started, then they all suddenly started coming out of the woodwork.

29 Jul 2005

Quote by smokerjim
Christopher Brookmyre, crime fiction with a wide streak of black humour, with a large Scottish influence. His writing has been described as thus..." Imagine the bastard child of Raymond Chandler, raised in the Billy Connelly household and schooled by Carl Hiassen." ( he is an American satirist - and a lot of people who have read both, reckon CB is the better of the 2 for British tastes )
I cannot praise him enough, truely enjoyable. PM me if you want a list of his books.

You beat me to it, he's got to be the best author I've come across in the past five years. I've just lent 'A big boy did it and ran away' to a friend of mine who's just completed her first year as a teacher.

27 Jul 2005

Very impressive, I think the biggest one I've ever seen in person (stretched ear piercings that is, rather than john thomases) belongs to Ed at Chrome in Cardiff - when I went to get my nipple done for the first time he decided to put me at my ease by showing me the inch+ thick bolt he'd made for it and then put his thumb through it and wiggled it at me.

26 Jul 2005

First off, I do hope you're not serious. You haven't been reading your spam have you? That's potentially quite risky - if you're not careful you could find the old chap being used as collateral in a dubious international monetary transaction. wink

wink

Seriously though, to get the results you're after they'd have to cut the suspensor ligament, so whilst you might get an apparent extra inch or two it's also be permanently pointing towards the floor. To increase the girth they suck fat from your belly and inject it into your knob. This has a tendency to form lumps and bumps rather than providing an even increase in girth. There is also a slight, but measurable chance that it'll get infected, turn black, and drop off (not a very high chance, but it's a side effect I personally would be glad to avoid).
Either way, if you've got 7" there's no reputable doctor on the planet that'll operate on you, so you increase the risk of a problem by going to somebody who'll operate on anyone who comes through the door.

26 Jul 2005

Quote by niceguy27
just like to add
a few months ago my brother decided he was gonna shave his back and chest so he got his misses to do it for him- she nearly took off one of his nips and his back looked like hes been atacked by an army of demented cats :shock: . recently he tried veet and came out in a rash all over. he now says hes stayin hairy.

I must admit, I briefly tried the idea of getting rid of the hair on my back when I was a teenager, but I very rapidly realised that if I wanted to follow this course of action it'd be like trying to paint the Forth bridge - normally I can just about remember to shave the parts of my face that aren't bearded (and a couple of other bits, but that shaving rash story can wait).

26 Jul 2005

Quote by bushwackers
If the lost files are *really* important, you can try sending your computer to a commercial service that specializes in recovering lost data.
It will not be cheap, but even after defragging the disk, there is a pretty decent chance that they can recover something.

Wife playing with her toys
If I were you I'd just shoot them again, far quicker and easier than trying to recover them after you've emptied the recycle bin and defragged the disk.
My advice to anyone that deletes anything important (apart from the snide comment about keeping backups that I'm required to make as a sysadmin) is not to do anything to the hard disk. Don't defrag, don't install any software onto the disk, and preferably don't reboot it (though this doesn't often make things drastically worse). As I'm a UNIX/Windows geek in that order, I'd probably boot with a Linux LiveCD* of some flavour and use that to attempt data recovery, as most of them won't touch any hard disks in the machine unless you ask them to.
*A LiveCD is an operating system that runs directly from a CD or DVD without being installed onto the hard disk. It's a bit like a DOS boot disk, but you can put whatever software you'd like on there as there's tons of room.

26 Jul 2005

Quote by Happy Cats
Ok, he was right, he was ill.
My Dad has the "I told you I was..............." the old Spike thing, on his grave

If I remember correctly, Spike Milligan's family were only able to put that on his grave after translating it into Irish Gaelic, but he did get his way after a fashion,which is I suppose the important thing.

25 Jul 2005

One for the Brummies on here - on the grass next to the small ornamental lake in Aston University's grounds, at about 9 o'clock at night in late summer (around dusk). I think about half a dozen people must have wandered past no more than 10 feet from my naked arse bobbing up and down.
I seem to have an occasional urge to do some fairly risky things, another one (though not sexual in nature) involved smoking a herbal cigarette whilst standing on top of the customs & excise office in St. Peter Port, Guernsey.

25 Jul 2005

My day would have to qualify as excellent.
I've had a number of interesting emails from a very pleasant individual, who with any luck I might be able to coax onto these forums. biggrin

biggrin

24 Jul 2005

Thanks Naughty Wigan couple, doesn't look to have worked this time (unless anyone out there's up for a quick meet this afternoon), but I figure it was worth doing anyway.

24 Jul 2005

Quote by HornyBunny
Oh.. i've been to Club F (fizical) once before... when i was living in Carlisle.. went with Claire.. fab lass from like birley area!

I'd wondered about that - some of the pictures of both available on the 'net look surprisingly similar, and the listed opening times don't overlap. I suppose it's an obvious solution to the problem of being able to afford to kit out a club from scratch - use a venue that's already kitted out appropriately.
Sorry for the thread-jack.

23 Jul 2005

Quote by Johnboywalton
Unfortunately I have a taste for the odd alcoholic beverage - hence my requirement to use the wheels when socialising. If I wasn't partial to the liquer I'd more often than not use my crutches when socialising. In answer to your question I do find peoples recations differ when I'm in a wheelchair - not in a distasteful way but in a way 'some' (and I emphasise some as they're in the minority) find it difficult to look past the wheelchair. Especially in terms of realising disabled peop's have sexual needs too (hence the thread title). Please don't think I'm bitter about being in a wheelchair and resent able bodied peop's as I'm not. Its just I've been this way long enough to pick up on these things.

Fair enough mate, I didn't mean to imply anything, I was genuinely interested in what the answer would be (though it is exactly what I expected you to say).
I can see that booze and crutches don't make for a good combination if you want to avoid UDIs (Unidentified Drinking Injuries), I've done enough damage to myself in the past whilst nominally in full control of my limbs - the best is probably the huge dent running the width of my arse cheeks, after I slipped at the top of a steep staircase in a pub, bounced once on my arse halfway down and landed in a crumpled heap at the bottom. It's still there 12 years later!