tomu's Profile

12 Jul 2008

I have a theory about hats. It mainly relates to artists and designers wearing hats, but I think it probably works for a lot of people:

Quote by Tomu's Hat Theory
Anyone wearing a hat does so because either:
* they are a genius
* they think they are a genius
* they want people to think they are a genius
The greater the genius/ego, the sillier the hat.

I think that with musicians this works with extravagant hair.

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11 Jul 2008

I use Comodo, Lavasoft, Adaware, AVG, Firefox with a popup blocker, and a router with a firewall. Seems to be ok.
Zonealarm did frequently cause my computer to stop dead.

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11 Jul 2008

chips, mayonnaise and an infinite supply of blowjobs. Give me those three things and I'll stay on their desert island forever. cool

Entertainingly, when asked a similar question ("you're being sent to a desert island, which five things do you take with you?"), Michael Owen's immediate response was "Food... water..."
*sigh* you're just not playing the game Michael, are you?

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11 Jul 2008

Quote by Peanut
I can understand Salad Cream, but Mayo?

Don't knock it till you've tried it... it's a beast!

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10 Jul 2008

Quote by winchwench
I'm as non-Belgian as it gets :smug:

Interesting - I wonder if there are degrees to which one can be non-Belgian. Surely one is either non-Belgian or one isn't?
If one can be more or less non-Belgian, then I would have thought, for example, that Chairman Mao would be considerably less Belgian than you. Or the Dalai Lama - I really can't see him eating his chips with mayo while swigging on a Leffe.

Quote by Lost
What tells you someone is a bit weird?

Usually the fact that they are still listening to me talking shit.

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10 Jul 2008

I haven't got as far as kids or mortgages but I can tell you this:

Quote by tomu
We're not old, contemporary pop music really is shit.

I was in a club with some friends the other weekend (an increasingly rare event these days). They were all friends from when I was in university (the first time... erm); some of whom I hadn't seen for about seven years.
We were bitching about all the music being shit (using our phones to write it down; all our ears are fucked because of too much loud music over the years) and one of the girls just dismissed it all with the words "We are old."
At 28! How sad.
I wanted to reply:

Quote by tomu
No! We are not old! There is something fundamentally different about the pop music of today. At some point between 1996 and 1998 the machine finally won and crushed the last little bits of life out of mainstream popular music. There are no more geniuses or artists; only products. There is nobody working in pop music who started after 1998 who will be remembered after they finish; there has been nothing new for ten years; there is nothing now for anyone to believe in; and this included the kids. I know, I teach the kids: they don't believe in anything any more. They don't believe in the Wombats (thank fuck!). They don't believe in Scouting for Girls, or Razorlight. I don't think they even believe in the Arcade Fire, who are as close as we get to artists now. That's why they don't buy the albums any more, and only steal the singles off the internet. When I ask the kids,
Kids, what sort of music do you actually want to make in your bands, or in your work as solo artists?

the kids say,

Quote by the Kids
It doesn't matter; it's not about that; we are committed to giving the industry exactly what it wants, because we are well aware that if we attempt to impose our own individuality and passion on our work we will never get a record deal and we will never be famous.

It's tragic but it really is true. They've just accepted that the battle is lost. So it falls to us more weathered campaigners to prove to them that there is still hope for the future. To do this we need to recognise that the past really was better (in some respects; I mean the internet is brilliant, and so is Google Earth and the fact you can buy a 250gb hard drive for £55 including delivery). We need to have the courage to state boldly that things really were better in our day. I mean - you go back ten years, you had Thom Yorke, Bjork, Jarvis Cocker, Mogwai, Venetian Snares, Aphex Twin, and loads more artists of some credibility/integrity/gravitas right in their prime. Can anyone in their 40s now tell me that when Nirvana was happening they looked at it with the same jaded skepticism with which those of us in our 30s now regard the Arctic Chiefs or Kaiser Monkeys? Did the first rave era look shit to people who were in their late 20s/early 30s at the time? Of course not. You were all trolleyed off your heads on pills in caves in Wiltshire - you all recognised it for what it was - the most significant cultural event of the 1980s, and you weren't missing it for a million pounds. Not even the million pounds the KLF burnt. Where is the new KLF? Do you see Calvin Harris burning a million pounds? I don't think so.
Where is the Ian Curtis? Where is the Prince? Where is the fucking Freddie Mercury?
We are not old; the music really is shit. We should not allow them to tell us that because we can see that the music is shit, we are therefore old.
...but I couldn't fit it in my text window, and in any case I was more interested in throwing some crazy shapes like a motherfucker.
I know that everything doesn't centre around pop music but it is a useful barometer. I think there hasn't been a new idea since postmodernism finally landed in mainstream culture in the mid 90s, and to be honest I actually think the stage is totally set. This is an exciting time. All it takes is a bit of faith and a concerted push. Unusually, that's going to have to come from grownups, because as I say, the kids seem to have bought the idea that ideas are no longer important; that's fine. We're not too old.

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10 Jul 2008

I continually end up being friends with people I'd like to shag. It's a bastard.
Given that I'm only very slightly and tentatively bisexual, and the three or so people I could call "best friends" are all straight men, I'm not going to go there.
I have lots of female friends I've wanted to shag a some point, some of whom I'd still like to shag. Since most of the people I want to shag have been told that I want to shag them (by me or by their friends who I told in the expectation that word would get around)... it's a) not that likely to happen, but b) I think not that likely to cause that much damage if it does happen.
On the other hand, I am friends with quite a lot of people I have shagged. Which has to be good.

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8 Jul 2008

Quote by noladreams30
I've been thinking, what makes a good kiss?

For me, exactly the same things that make a good fuck - passion, excitement, creativity, variety. Just faintly brushing my lips with her tongue one moment, then taking great chunks out of my neck the next (and I'm always pleased when I meet someone who has the skill of biting/chewing my neck without leaving a hickey...)
Necks, backs and shoulders are fantastic. Not enough people really go to town on them. On me at least if feels lovely.
And it's really important that she's into the kissing. Again like fucking - it's no fun with an apathetic partner.

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7 Jul 2008

Quote by noladreams30
Gosh. Wonders how one deletes deleted stuff..... *thinks may need to sort that out*

Only just noticed this, sorry. I think the only guaranteed way is to put a hole in the drive. Unfortunately this does rather kill everything else on it.

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7 Jul 2008

Quote by noladreams30
A swinger is basically someone who can differentiate between sex for love and sex for recreation and is willing to go beyond most of society's sexual taboos.

Oooh hurrah... does that make me a swinger?! dunno

And all this time I thought I was just a slapper!!!
wink

What do you mean "just"?
As to the original question, I'm not sure what I think. For a start I don't really like the actual word "swinger"; it sounds so... 70's. But that aside, given that I've been into this both as one of a couple and subsequently as a single person, I'd definitely say that I still consider myself a "swinger" *wince*.
I'd go further and say actually, for me, since being single, it's for me become more a part of my identity and less just an activity. Before, it was something we did sometimes; it was a part of our relationship; our interest in it was shared. Now, it's an aspect of who I am.
Well, actually I'm going to refine that a little; I guess I'd probably define "swinging" as being sexual activity with people not in a relationship with you, but with still some kind of shared understanding that this is being done in the spirit of sexual exploration. It's not just promiscuity; it's not just the fucks; it's the fucks plus the deliberate exploration of sexuality plus I suppose some idea that there is also a deliberate transgression of social norms.
I wonder whether I'd think that a group of single friends who all sex with each other are "swingers" (euch!)? Probably not. So I guess that the idea of transgressing a relationship does come in there somewhere. Nor two people who have sex with each other but don't consider that they're in a "relationship".
So I guess that I'm therefore not necessarily a swinger right now, and more of a... sexually open person...? But then, once an alcoholic, always an alcoholic, even if you're off the juice for a while.
Can't figure it out. I'll probably have to have a think and come back.

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6 Jul 2008

I'd really like to come to this one too... please miss?

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6 Jul 2008

I think it's only going to be a problem if the repairer was especially homophobic or TV/TS-o-phobic... I can't imagine in this day and age most people would be that bothered.
Or, of course, if you know them personally and would be embarrassed, or if you or anyone on your hard drive is famous at all...
:-) just pick a repairs shop in another town (ie- not an individual person; if they have to do the work in a workshop with other people they're probably less likely to look at your porn and even if they do, if someone else is their boss they'd have to justify refusing the work even if it did offend them).

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6 Jul 2008

Because the first thing any PC repairer does is check out all the pictures on the hard drive, including the ones you think you've deleted. I think this is probably what the OP is worried about?
Sorry, I don't. What's wrong with it? If you are that worried, is it something you can't solve by just copying your important data to another hard drive, wiping the original one, and re-installing everything?

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5 Jul 2008

This could only have been written by someone whose first language wasn't English - from Whale, the better Abba:
darling, darling, darling
don't hesitate, let's go
darling, darling, darling
i'll teach you all i know
i want to slap my titties
across your face
we slam our bodies
in a famished pace
i want to treat you, baby
like a horny dog
and ride your rapids, baby
on top of your big log
darling, darling, darling
i blow on your mind
darling, darling, darling
i think it started to grind
oh, my dripping tongue
across your skin
fill my mouth with you
until you start to grin
come on, let's change positions
'cause i want more
until your knee starts bleeding
on my marble floor
come on, i'll do ya, do ya
i'll do ya good
come on, i'll do ya, do ya
like you knew i would
do ya, do ya, do ya, do ya, do ya
like you knew i would
darling, darling, darling
come on and do your thang
oh darling, darling, darling
until my mind goes "bang!"
(giggles)
oh! please don't
touch me there
i like to -
oh, i don't care
take me
yeah, oh my god
i'm so happy, baby
i'm a lucky sod
oh no, oh no, ya don't stop
take me higher, tiger
take me to the top
oh, easy, baby
please go slow
faster, faster, faster
here we go
come on, i'll do ya, do ya
i'll do ya good
come on, i'll do ya, do ya
like you knew i would
do ya, do ya, do ya, do ya, do ya
like you knew i would
come on, i'll do ya, do ya
i'll do ya good
come on, i'll do ya, do ya
like you knew i would
do ya, do ya, do ya, do ya, do ya
like you knew i would
come on, i'll do ya, do ya
i'll do ya good
come on, i'll do ya, do ya
like you knew i would
do ya, do ya, do ya, do ya, do ya
like you knew i would

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5 Jul 2008

No, I thought this thread was going to be about unconventional approaches to personal hygiene.

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5 Jul 2008

Lie in the park, in the long grass, and listen to it move in the wind; and watch the clouds and the jetstreams overhead.
Or shit TV and shit food.
Or sit in my living room with my housemate Ewan, who refers to himself sitting on the sofa as "the greatest show on Earth", and is probably not far wrong - everyone in the audience usually ends up laughing so hard we're almost crying.
Or drink the naughty Belgians*, smoke a splaig and have a massive wank.
_____
*Leffe, Chimay, any of those bastards.

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5 Jul 2008

Quote by FurbyHug
I can...... but only in certain positions.... if im just in the normal on knees looking up then no... but if im layed on my back with my head tilted then yes......

I think this is all about the curvature of the penis. If it curves up then lying on your back is going to be easier... if it curves down then the kneeling position will be more fun for all concerned.
...that's going on observations based on exactly one penis, of course. Maybe I ought to suck a few to find out if that, er, stands up? Strictly in the interests of the advancement of knowledge.

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4 Jul 2008

Oh yes. You gotta love that tiny purple bastard.

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4 Jul 2008

Quote by noladreams30
Hoping to get some sustained practice in soon!

<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<my PM inbox :-)

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4 Jul 2008

What an excellent debate - there isn't enough philosophy about these days.
I especially like this bit -

Quote by TheAnalogKid
I'm a father of two, it's one thing to be rationale in here, quite another when your child is affected. But then that's why we can't be allowed to dish out the punishment - law of the land and all that, in theory to protect us all from ourselves!

Surprised nobody has mentioned de Sade, who very much argued that all sexual preferences (in which he very emphatically included , , necrophilia, coprophilia, scatophilia and anything else you can imagine...) are just "different" and not "wrong". De Sade did say and do a lot of odd things though.
Also,

Quote by kentswingers777
Most people nowadays have no problem with gay guys at all but...the child molester will never have much sympathy from people, and why should they? Society will never accept or tolerate that kind of behaviour,and it will be a sad day if they did.

is, interestingly enough, open to question. Today, many societies with moral codes generally fairly close to our own have significantly different definitions of "under-age" (In Sweden and France, 15, in Italy 14 and in Spain 13! Not to forget than in Northern Ireland it's 17, and in California it's 18; and then at the extremes, in many Arab countries, like Saudi Arabia, sex is legal as soon as you're married, which can be... er... at any age; whereas in Madagascar you're supposed to wait till you're 21!
So which of these is right? What makes us so sure that 16 is too young whereas 15 is ? I mean I know what I think*, but I'd never go so far as to say that my views are intrinsically, biologically correct.
(Actually that's a lie, I say that all the time.)
Anyway the point is that our responses to most sexual (and other!) actions/preferences/behaviours/attitudes are massively socially conditioned, not only biological or innately "right".
Disclaimer: not that I'm saying homosexuality is socially conditioned... or anything else, not sure in fact what I am saying, I'm tired and should be asleep... just thought the thing about different societies thinging different ages are ok was interesting.
IN EDIT: I totally agree that

Quote by kentswingers777
the child molester will never have much sympathy from people

Child molestation is of course a different issue to consensual sex and I wouldn't want to live in a society which endorsed it. Not that I'm saying I'd want consensual sex with younger people to be allowed either... oh crap... brain fart. I need to go to bed.
____
*What I think is that 16 is about the right age for a law - it discourages the 13 and 14-year-olds from having sex. I also think that no grown adult should be dating anyone certainly less the 18, and even above that depending on relative levels of maturity, but I don't think this is necessarily an area for the law.

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3 Jul 2008

Quote by Lost
Lets be real. If youve got 20 minutes to eat your sarnie and be back at your workstation. Your hardly going to want to know that the economy of Uzbekistan experienced growth significantly above trend over 2006–2007. GDP grew by 7.7% and 7.0% according to official estimates, as against an average of 4.2% in 1999–2005. Agriculture’s contribution was helped by a record cotton crop.
It is also wrong to assume that 4 million readers of the Sun are not literate/intelligent or have enough wit to make up their own minds. they read for their own reasons. Mainly i assume for the entertainment which they gain from it. Rightly or wrongly in your honest opinions but thats the truth of selling the Sun in Britain to 4 million people

It's a fair cop. Good point, well made. Although that said - I absolutely don't have a problem with people wanting entertainment or wanting to switch off or anything. What I have a problem with is one thing pretending to be something else. Entertainment pretending to be news. Or escapism pretending to be news. McDonald's pretending to be food. The Wombats pretending to be scouse. There's a fundamental dishonesty in there that really irks me.

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3 Jul 2008

Oh, hello mum...!

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2 Jul 2008

Quote by Lost
Ours is
Gloomy bloody Gloucestershire Or Crappy Cotswolds. Have you seen the weather out there. July eh? what gives :sad:

Murkyside?

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2 Jul 2008

Quote by Peanut
And oral sex performs what biological function?
Climbing onto a bus to go to work requires which particular gene?
The peroxide blonde's hair colour gene doesn't yet seem to be included in the Human Genome Project.
Condoms, though wonderfully useful and pretty much essential these days, are used to prevent normal biological activity, i.e. allowing bacteria and virii to enter our bodies and reproduce.
All abnormal things to do with our bodies, yet somehow are still very popular with the average hetero.

Brilliant - but never mind Condoms, what about the contraceptive pill?

Quote by peanut

I agree with all the above.
I go back to what I was saying before though, I think we're all to some extent ignorant and we all have certain gut responses built-in. Being aware of that is a massive part of dealing with it.

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2 Jul 2008

Quote by buckingfabe
I just read yesterday's Sun (a friends copy not mine). I think they should be taken to court under the trades description act as I don't think I found a single item of "news" in it. There were a lot of articles on trivia, loads of celebrity gossip items and plenty of salacious items which just could be said to be stirring things up .... but real actual hardcore news? Nope couldn't find any!!

You see this it what scares me about that thing. It's like a haze thrown up to prevent people looking at the world and going, "What the FUCK is going on?". Even when we're not talking about massive and rampant travesties of journalism and of the Truth (as in the article linked above), it's still packed full of insidious little lies and decoys to prevent you looking at your own situation and doing something about it: "Tits! Celebrity shite! Football! Want to learn about anything that actually affects your own, real life? Nah fuck that... more tits!"
(It upsets me that he's kind of done this to the Times as well, albeit to a lesser degree; still, it has a LOT of sports coverage and a surprising amount of celebrity nonsense and not that much actual News.)
The only time the Sun contain anything approaching news is when they're covering Europe. Even then what they write is pretty much bullshit, to a fairly staggering degree actually. A lot of the most famous bits of controversial European intrusiveness in our life were made up by the Sun and believed by it's readers. For example that thing about curvy bananas being outlawed... never happened. (The proof? Go into your kitchen. Look at a banana. Is it curved?) It was never even a serious proposal. Made up by the Sun.
Murdoch hates Europe because he cannot get into the European media market. The German and Italian companies are too strong. He's also terrified of them getting in on the British market. He doesn't want any European integration that will threaten that. So you will never see a pro-European story in any media outlet owned by Murdoch (The Sun, News of the World, the Times, Sky News, etc). He relentlessly denigrates any politician who supports Europe or the sort of ownership laws that are currently preventing him from buying Channel 4 (he keeps trying, he's not allowed, and he's really angry about it!), and supports whichever party promises to do the most to further his interests.
Fine, once you know that you're seeing the world through tinted spectacles you can start to take what people are telling you with the appropriate amount of salt, but a lot of people read that and think they're getting a balanced and fair picture. That's why it's important to read a variety of outlets - they all (including the Guardian) will try to spin a certain angle. With the possible exception of the BBC, which is legally obliged to try to be as balanced as possible, and is really closely scrutinised for it.
Well anyway I'm not that fond of The Sun. I'll give it a rest now.

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2 Jul 2008

Quote by kentswingers777
I read the Sun on a fri as Gaunty is in there! :lol:

I don't know who Gaunty is but I'm sure it's a fine read. :-)
Apologies for going in a bit aggressively this morning, I had a hangover but it's progressing nicely.
...although I did stop myself from saying:

Quote by kentswingers777
And you read ?

Yes I do, that's why I can get beyond the Sun...
:-p

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2 Jul 2008

Quote by kentswingers777
The Guardian at all ?

Well, yes, as I said:

Quote by tomu
Generally, anything other than the Sun, the Star, the Mail and the Express.

If you want a full list:
The Guardian, the Independent, the Echo, the FT, the Mirror sometimes, the Observer, the BBC website, the New York Times, the Washington Post, the Economist, Private Eye, some other things I've probably forgotten, various academic journals, and whatever paper or magazine happens to be in the takeaway or hairdressers or waiting room I'm in as long as it isn't the Sun, the Star, the Mail or the Express. I would feel embarrassed to be seen holding them.
I don't read the same thing every day. I believe in getting a variety of perspectives.

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2 Jul 2008

Quote by kentswingers777
on our way to the yard in yesterdays lovely sunshine(we had some paintwork to do on a truck)my son stopped at a shop and came out with a copy of the sun he saw my look of astonishment,he just said "we`ve got no masking paper"
made me laugh to find a use for this rag,now that it cant be used to wrap chips any more.

A rag it may well be but...it has the biggest readership by far of any of the other tabloids! I wonder why that is?
Because it uses short words and has big pictures. And is mainly about tits, football and bigotry. So nobody has to engage their brain.
The shocking thing is that apparently some people actually believe some of the articles in it... :shock: can you imagine?

Quote by kentswingers777
And you read ?

Generally, anything other than the Sun, the Star, the Mail and the Express.

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2 Jul 2008

Not particularly edifying viewing but it did at least make sure the horrible bastard went down:

(I'm a Newcastle fan and this makes me ashamed).
On the other hand, I personally have been mugged right under a CCTV camera, and assaulted under another, and had my bike nicked from directly under another, and the police have been unable to find any evidence. (The first two of those as a teenager in Newcastle, the third in my new home city, Liverpool... no surprises there :-))

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29 Jun 2008

Quote by Phuckers
my signature below is a qoute from a 12th century Italian poet,its significant to me cause its a reflection of whats is currently happening in zimbabwe,where that brutal dictator is crippling his country while most of the African presidents are silent....
so what does yours mean to you

Hear hear to that. Have you seen Shooting Dogs? That's probably the attention-getting, powerful film I've seen in a long time, if not ever.

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