I fine thankyou
I'll be over here>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>
Kicking the Cat!!! :censored:
I promise not to tell anymore but this last one, It involves me and a certain lady friend of mine.
We had enjoyed a rather playfull evening with An australian wine companies product and were both feeling well, horny! So one thing led to the other, and it was the other I which I was mostly interested in. Anyhow, pissed and horny we started and had some marital aids at our disposal. I kinda lined the buggers up like the platoon, ready for action, we were in the lounge on a lovely soft, cosy rug in front of the roaring fire and the time had arisen for use of said troops.
All standing to attention and ready for action Sir!
C'mon boys, I thought, were going in...
I grabbed the first one I cpuld reach... a caucasian fella, kinda like that inch high private eye fella, only about 8 inches, anyway I proceeded to entertain the lady by getting the fella to enter her. Oh!!! she was yelling and writhing, wriggling and yelping and doing so much swearing..
Hmm I thought, this little shitface is pleasing her a bit eh!
It was only when she managed to escape the onslaught of the wee soldiers grasp, nearly by the kitchen door by the way, she'd wriggled her way over there...best part of 15 foot, that, I got slapped straight in the chops!
WTF was that for, I said!
Hmmmm
Turns out when i'd lined the boys up for action, I hadn't realised the effect that the roaring fuppin fire had had on the latex and plastic troopers.
Oops.... nearly plastic welded the poor girl right up! she didn't walk right for weeks..oh well, live an learn, that's my motto.
Her's was, Fupping Burn!!
My resolution is to get a bloody life!
Seems like it's passing so quick an i've been so happy(not)
So I either slump an give up, or stick a cracker where the sun don't shine, (an hope it don't hurt too much) and get what I want, give of me what others need and start smiling.
chin chin
x