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DJohn
Over 90 days ago
Straight Male, 56
0 miles · Tyne and Wear
Forum
Sex God
They've nicked our booze. They've run off with our telly. They've cleared the pile of unwashed socks from the corner of the room.
We're not going to stand for it, I tell you!
No, that's not the TV in my pocket. I'm just exceptionally pleased to see you all.
sneaking back to the GFZ. Do you think they'll notice the TV is gone?. They'll all be too busy eating choccies and watching Meg Ryan movies ... err ... on the TV ... umm ... running away now.
We're not going to stand for it, I tell you!
No, that's not the TV in my pocket. I'm just exceptionally pleased to see you all.
sneaking back to the GFZ. Do you think they'll notice the TV is gone?. They'll all be too busy eating choccies and watching Meg Ryan movies ... err ... on the TV ... umm ... running away now.
Sex God
Ooh.. special treatment! Does that mean you remove the sandpaper from the strap-on?
But before you get too excited, I have to confess. I'm such a poor Australian that they kicked me out of the country. I don't drink beer. Can't stand the taste of vegemite. Wouldn't know one end of a surfboard from the other. If I stay out in the sun too long my skin starts to glow an extremely bright red. And I've never shagged a kangaroo.
Shameful, but all true.
But before you get too excited, I have to confess. I'm such a poor Australian that they kicked me out of the country. I don't drink beer. Can't stand the taste of vegemite. Wouldn't know one end of a surfboard from the other. If I stay out in the sun too long my skin starts to glow an extremely bright red. And I've never shagged a kangaroo.
Shameful, but all true.
Sex God
Life is too short. Instead of brooding on all the things I don't have, I try to enjoy whatever life gives me. It's not always easy, but I believe that no matter what is happening, it's possible to find some good in it.
So - no women in your life? Enjoy the time on your own doing all those guy things. If you're happy, you'll be seen as someone who might be fun to be with. If you look too desperate, they won't even give you a chance.
That's the theory, anyway. It sometimes even works.
So - no women in your life? Enjoy the time on your own doing all those guy things. If you're happy, you'll be seen as someone who might be fun to be with. If you look too desperate, they won't even give you a chance.
That's the theory, anyway. It sometimes even works.
Sex God
Possible uses for a strap-on:
Something with which to stir your tea
A stick for the dog to fetch
A spare leg for a very short table
A camera monopod
A hammer
A bookmark
Balance it carefully on its end, and use it to detect earthquakes
Oh, I suppose you could use it for sex as well...
Something with which to stir your tea
A stick for the dog to fetch
A spare leg for a very short table
A camera monopod
A hammer
A bookmark
Balance it carefully on its end, and use it to detect earthquakes
Oh, I suppose you could use it for sex as well...
Sex God
mmmmmmmmm!!! Yummy!
What lovely people Kit and Kat are. Even in the middle of what was obviously an extreme amount of fun, they were thinking of us. Thank you, thank you!
I wouldn't worry about Biker, Blue. Kit looks well worth a little discomfort. He doesn't appear to be suffering much...
What lovely people Kit and Kat are. Even in the middle of what was obviously an extreme amount of fun, they were thinking of us. Thank you, thank you!
I wouldn't worry about Biker, Blue. Kit looks well worth a little discomfort. He doesn't appear to be suffering much...
Sex God
I already know the answer (it's the same answer as it is every time: "a very long way from here"), but I shall take this opportunity to further my education in British geography. So that's where Shropshire is.
I trust you have used these woods and waterfalls to their full advantage. Though maybe this isn't the best time of year for it.
You might have to be a bit patient with the rabbit photos. I'll see what I can do.
I trust you have used these woods and waterfalls to their full advantage. Though maybe this isn't the best time of year for it.
You might have to be a bit patient with the rabbit photos. I'll see what I can do.
Sex God
You're sending Dicks out in search of Kit? To keep her company, I guess. No wonder she loves you so much.
And Blue Eyes - you've had this camera for hours. You must have had a play with it by now! Do you need me to come down and press the button? I've got my own tripod, you know
And Blue Eyes - you've had this camera for hours. You must have had a play with it by now! Do you need me to come down and press the button? I've got my own tripod, you know
