I did once consider doing a "Blond Date" from here where we get the contestants.
A lovely lady asks the questions and 3 guys post their answers under masquerade logins then you make your choice and go out for a nice cyber date.
Maybe I should give it a try :giggle:
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HornyLittleBlonde
Over 90 days ago
Straight Female, 51
Straight Female, 65
0 miles · Derbyshire
Forum
Quote by Manolishi
I loved the post from HLB, it got me thinking. That would be my perfect scenario, but as I said, its rare for that to happen, but when it does, the result is amazing. HLB and Dammie are testament to that. I don't recall ever meeting a more happy couple. Makes me kinda jealous though!
I will offer a few words of warning though.
When dammie and I first declared our feelings we were still a bit spooked by the idea of a relationship, but we both knew we loved each other.
And if you're all thinking "well 2 swingles get together and hey presto" it ain't quite that simple.
When we first got together, we'd both swung as singles and as couples with partners, but it's quite different doing it with someone you're in love with and I wondered what it was going to be like (as it turned out we were both fine with it)
There were other differences such as I preferred meets at houses, dammie at clubs.
Were we happy for one of us to play without the other or did we only want to play together?
We both decided to initially take a break and get to know each other better and work out our boundary's before we started to play. And I think it works because we both put each other first and not swinging.
What I'm trying to say (in a very roundabout way) is all too often people think being part of a couple makes it easier to swing and therefore get together for the wrong reasons.
If you're going to have a full on relationship you need to be happy with your vanilla life together as well as your swinging one.
And that only works if you get together because you want to be with that particular person (as opposed to looking to get together with another swinger). I'm not saying the latter doesn't work at all, but just that there's a difference between 2 swingers forming a relationship and 2 people who enjoy each other's company and are swinging playmates
OK I think I'm in a good position to answer this, but bear with me - it might get a bit long 
When I first joined the site as a single fem, I'd got a bit fed up with telling vanilla guys I wanted NSA and them intepreting that as "ah she's been hurt in the past. Give her time".
I had a couple of people get really possessive after I'd been quite clear about how I felt and it pissed me off.
I found this place for a few reasons:
I'd had a few threesomes and wanted to explore that more
I wanted to meet people with NSA
I travelled around a lot with work and thought it would be a good way to liven up some of my nights away in hotels :rascal:
The last thing I wanted was a relationship and I made that incredibly clear to everyone I met.
And then I met Dambuster
We had an initial meet in a pub, some lengthy conversations and found we had a very similar sense of humour.
We began spending quite a few evenings together at his place and we started to develop serious feelings for each other.
Initial reaction was "what the hell am I doing" but I began to realise I actually enjoyed the vanilla element of our friendship as much as the sexual side.
When I thought about it, I realised it was certain aspects of relationships that I didn't like:
The possesiveness
The control
Having to hide parts of my personality - my bi side, my flirty nature
Now I was spending time with someone who actually liked that about me
Who gave a mischievous little smile & wink when I flirted/snogged other guys
Who I could play the "would you?" game with when we were out shopping
Who I could tell my deepest darkest desires to without worrying what they thought of me.
I'm now happier than I've ever been in my life. :inlove:
___________________________________________
Now after all that waffle:
I don't think if you go looking for it, you will necessarily find it, but.......
Maybe arranging meets that are social as well as sexual may open some doors e.g.
Meeting a guy for a nice meal and conversation before shagging as opposed to a dogging/club meet
When I first joined the site as a single fem, I'd got a bit fed up with telling vanilla guys I wanted NSA and them intepreting that as "ah she's been hurt in the past. Give her time".
I had a couple of people get really possessive after I'd been quite clear about how I felt and it pissed me off.
I found this place for a few reasons:
I'd had a few threesomes and wanted to explore that more
I wanted to meet people with NSA
I travelled around a lot with work and thought it would be a good way to liven up some of my nights away in hotels :rascal:
The last thing I wanted was a relationship and I made that incredibly clear to everyone I met.
And then I met Dambuster
We had an initial meet in a pub, some lengthy conversations and found we had a very similar sense of humour.
We began spending quite a few evenings together at his place and we started to develop serious feelings for each other.
Initial reaction was "what the hell am I doing" but I began to realise I actually enjoyed the vanilla element of our friendship as much as the sexual side.
When I thought about it, I realised it was certain aspects of relationships that I didn't like:
The possesiveness
The control
Having to hide parts of my personality - my bi side, my flirty nature
Now I was spending time with someone who actually liked that about me
Who gave a mischievous little smile & wink when I flirted/snogged other guys
Who I could play the "would you?" game with when we were out shopping
Who I could tell my deepest darkest desires to without worrying what they thought of me.
I'm now happier than I've ever been in my life. :inlove:
___________________________________________
Now after all that waffle:
I don't think if you go looking for it, you will necessarily find it, but.......
Maybe arranging meets that are social as well as sexual may open some doors e.g.
Meeting a guy for a nice meal and conversation before shagging as opposed to a dogging/club meet
Quote by KissHLB
That's what bothers me I think. If Apples wasn't banned and left of their own accord should they be possibly outed by a site Mod in the forum? Even if they did flounce.
Sorry to refer to you in that way Sarge, just looking at it objectively as a member.
:doh:
I get ya now
:wave: Kiss
Quote by Kiss
Post and be dammed.
As much as I am intrigued to know who Apples is I'm not sure I like this.
If Apples was a banned member then shouldn't they just be re-banned?
I'm don't think that's the case Kiss.
There's been many a banned member tried to sneak through the back door in a disguise, but The Sarge and his security team are usually quick to spot them and boot them out.
As Apple has mentioned previous membership, I suspect the previous user left of their own accord (possibly with a flounce for good measure)
Quote by Mallock2006
I was meant to phone in to let Shireen know all was well and I was OK..
I didnt
I have stopped by Shireen's workplace and eaten humble pie (I had a text message on my way home to from someone telling me about the thread) and I am certain I will have to eat quite a bit more before being fully forgiven...
*I now prepare myself for my**and my* :kick:
:smackbottom: & :kick:
Might I suggest you take a trip to the florists & nearest lush outlet when you stop to get your humble pie?
Shireen
Quote by essex34m
Is that egg shells I feel under my feet?
Crush them.....
It makes a great sound
Wear shoes though ...... kinky ones preferably :twisted:
make it boots, and i will happily watch
Oooh The Laird, Calista & Chav and some kinky shoes & boots :inlove:
I could get to like this egg shell lark :shock:
OK I for one am sorry that you are feeling like you are right now and I am sorry that your munch got dragged into this debate.
As I said previously, I do not for 1 minute think that you would have even considered inviting them to the munch of you thought you would hurt/upset anyone or put anyone's security at risk.
I also believed that you had done everything possible to relieve any doubts you might have had.
Do I think this thread shouldn't have been started?
Absolutely not.
It's a serious issue and I think everyone has a right to comment on how they feel about it.
I personally just don't want to be at a munch where SHM employees are present. I chose to pull out. That's my choice.
In this community no-one should do anything they feel uncomfortable doing.
and for it to be suggested (by other people) that my choosing not to put myself in a situation where I feel uncomfortable showed a lack of trust in someone I view in the highest regard was also quite upsetting.
Also with the view that paid employees who are paid to be here are members just like any other is not right (in my personal opinion).
And what's worrying for me is that if they are viewed as members of the site like any other, then future munch organisers are obligedto invite them if they ask for an invite.
As I said previously, I do not for 1 minute think that you would have even considered inviting them to the munch of you thought you would hurt/upset anyone or put anyone's security at risk.
I also believed that you had done everything possible to relieve any doubts you might have had.
Do I think this thread shouldn't have been started?
Absolutely not.
It's a serious issue and I think everyone has a right to comment on how they feel about it.
I personally just don't want to be at a munch where SHM employees are present. I chose to pull out. That's my choice.
In this community no-one should do anything they feel uncomfortable doing.
and for it to be suggested (by other people) that my choosing not to put myself in a situation where I feel uncomfortable showed a lack of trust in someone I view in the highest regard was also quite upsetting.
Also with the view that paid employees who are paid to be here are members just like any other is not right (in my personal opinion).
And what's worrying for me is that if they are viewed as members of the site like any other, then future munch organisers are obligedto invite them if they ask for an invite.
Quote by Jags
There they sing the words of one song to the tune of another. Sometimes hysterically funny!
I used to live next door but one to a church very close to the centre of the local town.
I remember one sunny Sunday lunchtime sunbathing in the back garden
There was a rock event organised on the market place and the local church service happening simultaneously.
It was rather bizarre hearing "bring your daughter to the slaughter" being played under a chorus of "bread of heaven" :shock:
Interesting thread. :thumbup:
In terms of discretion there are times when other people know anyway.
e.g. if you're shagging in a club then others are going to see you.
If there's a bunch of you statying in the same hotel and you're coming out of someone's room in the morning and pass everyone making their way to the breakfast room.
To me it's a question of motives.
If you're all happy and the odd thing gets mentioned fine.
What I really dislike is people who purposely namedrop who they've shagged as a form of self advertisement - especially when it's without the other person's consent
In terms of discretion there are times when other people know anyway.
e.g. if you're shagging in a club then others are going to see you.
If there's a bunch of you statying in the same hotel and you're coming out of someone's room in the morning and pass everyone making their way to the breakfast room.
To me it's a question of motives.
If you're all happy and the odd thing gets mentioned fine.
What I really dislike is people who purposely namedrop who they've shagged as a form of self advertisement - especially when it's without the other person's consent
Quote by Mallock2006
I also dont consider The Editor to be a bona fide member as has already been said several times they are a member of staff with a log in....
You dont have to be a swinger to be a member here but you need to be active on the site IMHO.
I'd agree with most of that, apart from the last bit.
Even if they are actively posting I don't think that makes them a member.
A member is someone who is here because they want to be part of this site in a personal capacity regardless of whether they swing/post
Quote by Lost
I am enthralled by this thread it is enlightning provacative and interesting. Is'nt it amazing how things progress i have respect for all the people posting views and comments on here. This is so what a 'Forum' is for. Having a decent discussion being thrashed out to its bare bones.
I once atteended a talk given by Tony Benn. Poitically i think, though the man came across superbly and nearly making me believe a square was a round his ideas were a bit suss. I did however, appreciate what he said about having an opposition party.
He maintained that it was the duty of any opposition party to pick apart an idea policy reform dicussion whatever to its utmost and almost rediculous ends. If this is done then the actions of government to prevent or head off such inquisition would have to have a watertight and thus very thought out and hopefully correct case to answer the house.
This i believe to be the case that is happening here. Which is a good thing. Points have been put across to people and hopefully these things will be thought about more carefully and decisions base upon more intensive deliberation in the future. This is the way we move forward. Sometimes it may not be pleasant but it is the right way.
This isnt even my opinion BTW because i know im right :twisted:
I'm going to save this post in my favourites as I think it sums up my feelings perfectly
Possibly, but I think there's more hijacking going on elsewhere by members who don't see to be threatened at all by the environment. I think some people just seem to post that way
I think sometimes people get too emotionally involved and can't separate debate and discussion from argument and insult.
I've always been quite outspoken and a few people have told me when I met them that they found me a bit scary on the forums :shock:
I've always spoke my mind, but I've adhered to the AUP and
I've never had a thread locked
I've never had a post deleted
I've never been banned
I've never received a warning
And that's not just on here it's on all sites I post on.
Although Jags did once threaten to deactivate me, because I posted this :giggle:
Oh btw chav, be very careful. Last time we discussed hijacking here an armadillo was seriously injured :shock:
I think sometimes people get too emotionally involved and can't separate debate and discussion from argument and insult.
I've always been quite outspoken and a few people have told me when I met them that they found me a bit scary on the forums :shock:
I've always spoke my mind, but I've adhered to the AUP and
I've never had a thread locked
I've never had a post deleted
I've never been banned
I've never received a warning
And that's not just on here it's on all sites I post on.
Although Jags did once threaten to deactivate me, because I posted this :giggle:
Oh btw chav, be very careful. Last time we discussed hijacking here an armadillo was seriously injured :shock:
Quote by Jags
I would genuinely like to know too. The admin who are around aren't any who would know the answer probably so please don't take the silence as any form of not being willing to answer.
:thumbup:
Hopefully we'll find out in the week.
In the meantime, if anyone want to hazard a guess....
answers on a postcard to:
The SH Mystery Guest competition
PO Box 69
SH Towers
:giggle:
