And yes, I voted!
Venusxxx
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VenusnMars
Over 90 days ago
Straight Female, 54
Straight Female, 83
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Clare, I`ve done this with my children, and watched them become osterocised (especally one of them) as a result. I can almost understand why some parents encourage them not only to join in with the `mob mentality`, but to be good at it too. They don`t want thier children to become the victims. I have one child who seems to be quite popular now, but I`m not happy with the `hard arse` attitude her peers are encouraging (difficult age, thirteen). She was constantly being bullied before she found these `peers`.
I`m a great believer in allowing my children to be children. My eldest killed her social life in the early years of primary by pretending to be different animals when playing. A school report commented that she was immature......she was 6. My middle child started to hide the fact she played with Barbies at the age of nine, and my youngest who`s now nine himself, bollocked me for giving him a Pokemon T-shirt to wear the other day, it`s no longer Pokemon, it`s now something I can`t pronounce! :shock:
Venusxxx
I`m a great believer in allowing my children to be children. My eldest killed her social life in the early years of primary by pretending to be different animals when playing. A school report commented that she was immature......she was 6. My middle child started to hide the fact she played with Barbies at the age of nine, and my youngest who`s now nine himself, bollocked me for giving him a Pokemon T-shirt to wear the other day, it`s no longer Pokemon, it`s now something I can`t pronounce! :shock:
Venusxxx
Quote by JudyTV
Hi Venus,
You are of course quite right there will always be the odd one who escapes this poetic justice or appears to. After saying this, can we really be sure that their pain is non existent or just well hidden due to the arrogance of a lifetime of bullying and rule by intimidation.
No, I don`t think we can be sure. In the case of my Father-in-law (sorry to keep using him as an example, but these observations have to come from somewhere) I would hazzard a guess that his behaviours were definately a result of some inner unhappiness. Unfortunately I`m sure he kept this hidden on some unconcious level, allowing his mindset to project this upon everyone around him. Conciously I think he was convinced that everyone else was at fault, allowing himself the `illusion` of happiness, could he tell the difference between illusion and reality I wonder? Perhaps it was my undesirable trait which waited in vain for the day the realisation would hit that in fact he was the cause of so much misery?
I would like to think there is such a thing as a kind of divine providence of some kind from wherever and or whatever. I know I sound naive but it gives me some peace so pacify me
I do this too, but with `life after death` theories, I don`t have a faith, but neither do I like to write off the possibilty of an afterlife, even in the face of overwhelming scientific fact. Still waiting for a scientific answer which will pacify me, I`m happier in the hoping.
That said, if this thread dissolves into a religious debate I`ll ask a mod to lock it! :twisted:
Of course I`ll allow you your pacifier Judy :rose: , we all need at least one.
Venusxxx
(((hugs)))Quote by dazandlou
i think people joining this site has been largely to do with media coverage of swinging, and i personally dont think its a good way to begin using a site such as this. in the last few months there has been a significant increase in the amount of swinging related tv shows, magazine and paper articles etc, and i think people joining out of curiosity because of what theyve seen and not an interest in swinging itself is wrong.
Actually Lou, I do disagree (in the nicest way
)I thank god that if these new members are here because of some of the less than flattering media coverage, that they are at least getting an opportunity to find out that we are living breathing`normal` people, and I commend them for coming to the site to find out for themselves, instead of arbiturarily accepting the tabloid bullshit.
It`s good for them, it`s good for us.........
it`s just not necessarily good for the mods!
Venusxxx
My point is, (sorry I babbled), is the human condition so shallow, and so perverse, that we can only be happy if we disregard others.
LC, perhaps I should ammend that to `disregard others who don`t fit into society`s popular mould?
I`m just not too happy about the requirements needed to fit that mould. Once a popular mould is in place, where`s the condemnation for treating those outside of this mould badly going to come from? The minority, that`s where. Hardly enough to turn the tide I fear. If the majority rules, is this evidence of what human nature is? Because if it is, it`s a cruel joke. I`d like to think that the minority are those who have `evolved` somewhat, instead of some failing branch of humanity which doesn`t fit in with Mother nature`s sense of humour.
Certainly happiness is not based on any social structure anyway. It's entirely based on internal consciousnes and realisation.
That certainly helps, but it`s a bit of a bugger for the natural extrovert.
Venusxxx
Quote by JudyTV
Everything in life usually has a price. It may be now, later today, next year or later in life. To those who rule by force or are mob handed then it is is in my opinion only a matter of time before the bill drops onto the mat and the longer it takes the bigger it will be.
JudyTV
Does it though Judy? Or at least, does it happen enough? Sometimes it seems the masses have hit a `winning` approach, for themselves and thier immediates at least, and there are plenty of them out there. My father in law was such a man, he died with no regrets, pissed us off immensely. We had been waiting for the penny to drop.
These attitudes can be passed down through the generations. Is it something humankind will eventually evolve out of, or is it simply our version of `survival of the fittest`? Once upon a time `survival of the fittest` concerned those who couldn`t cut it physically, thanks to modern day science this is no longer such an issue. Perhaps the speed with which our science has progressed has made humankind just a little too complacent. If only as much effort had been dedicated to the understaning of emotional makeup. Now it seems the rat race has no need for that.
I blame the downfall of the ancient Greeks, they were on the right track!
Venuxxx
I was watching TV one morning, when on Trisha, a plump peirced woman, who was very alternative appeared as a guest. Her story was that she liked to streak. She wanted to put her case across, about why she felt the need to express her freedom to be comfortable with her body, and free herself from what she saw was the restraints of clothing.
What upset me was that she was completely attacked by the audiance, and mob mentality kicked in. One woman told her that if she took her clothes off in a park in front of her children, that she would smack her in the face, the audiance clapped: another woman told her that she should colour her see through clothes in black, and cover her head with them, the audiance clapped; then amid jeers, another woman told her that she was a disgrace to all women and should be locked up, again the audiance clapped.
These people are the ones who are supposed to give valid points of view about issues which occur on the show. I have seen past shows (I lead a sad life I know!) where young pretty girls wish to expose their bodies, and a great many people from the audiance have supported them. Confronted with a fat, peirced tattooed alternative woman, and they completely attacked her.
I was mortified when I watched this, particularly at the threat of violence and the support it received. When I tried to listen to what the woman had to say, I found her to be very intelligent with an interesting point of view, a point of view I would have liked to have heard more of, but popular mob mentality won the day, and I don`t feel that her points were discussed as closely as they could have been. It didn`t surprise me to learn from her friends who tried to defend her, that she had lived a hard life. As far as popular entertainment was concerned, she was nothing more than a freak show. How many of us are guilty of this attitude when we are happy? Which brings me to the irony of the human condition.
In my own experiances, and observations, I have come to the conclusion that those who have not been close to human suffering are shallow, ignorant, but more often than not, successful happy people. Is it that to be a success in this life, that by our very natures we should be cruel and unfeeling? Take the social structure of the school playground (for that is where it all starts); the popular kids have a following, they dictate who is liked, and who is not. If by pointing out a child who does not fit into the social mould, their own status goes up a notch, then they will of course do that. The other kids will then ostracize this child, in the hope of also becoming more like the cool kid, it is a system which works well, for the majority, why change it for the sake of the one child who get the thin edge of the wedge? In fact this rhetorical question does not even exist for the majority, it only exists for the child who is rejected. Therefore it is only the rejected child who who ponders this, and therefore learn to think a little deeper than the majority, to give those who do do not fit in, more than a quick judgement.
This does not change when this social group reach adulthood. The violent kids grow up to be rough adults, threatening to `smack` anyone who crosses their path, so noone crosses them, as a result they raise their children to be the same, and it works for them. The `successful` kids, who get to flaunt their latest fashions, who were encouraged to grow up quicker, just to have the `edge` on the other kids, so they can be the coolest, still get to criticise the other adults who don`t fit their `ideal`, and surprise, surprise, their children are 9, going on 30, and the majority of these people are happy, shallow granted, but do you think they notice, or are suffering for it? I think not.
Even I myself, in one short period of my life, when I made friends with two `normal` people, began to behave in a more `popular` manner, it didn`t last, I blew it.
My point is, (sorry I babbled), is the human condition so shallow, and so perverse, that we can only be happy if we disregard others?
Venusxxx
What upset me was that she was completely attacked by the audiance, and mob mentality kicked in. One woman told her that if she took her clothes off in a park in front of her children, that she would smack her in the face, the audiance clapped: another woman told her that she should colour her see through clothes in black, and cover her head with them, the audiance clapped; then amid jeers, another woman told her that she was a disgrace to all women and should be locked up, again the audiance clapped.
These people are the ones who are supposed to give valid points of view about issues which occur on the show. I have seen past shows (I lead a sad life I know!) where young pretty girls wish to expose their bodies, and a great many people from the audiance have supported them. Confronted with a fat, peirced tattooed alternative woman, and they completely attacked her.
I was mortified when I watched this, particularly at the threat of violence and the support it received. When I tried to listen to what the woman had to say, I found her to be very intelligent with an interesting point of view, a point of view I would have liked to have heard more of, but popular mob mentality won the day, and I don`t feel that her points were discussed as closely as they could have been. It didn`t surprise me to learn from her friends who tried to defend her, that she had lived a hard life. As far as popular entertainment was concerned, she was nothing more than a freak show. How many of us are guilty of this attitude when we are happy? Which brings me to the irony of the human condition.
In my own experiances, and observations, I have come to the conclusion that those who have not been close to human suffering are shallow, ignorant, but more often than not, successful happy people. Is it that to be a success in this life, that by our very natures we should be cruel and unfeeling? Take the social structure of the school playground (for that is where it all starts); the popular kids have a following, they dictate who is liked, and who is not. If by pointing out a child who does not fit into the social mould, their own status goes up a notch, then they will of course do that. The other kids will then ostracize this child, in the hope of also becoming more like the cool kid, it is a system which works well, for the majority, why change it for the sake of the one child who get the thin edge of the wedge? In fact this rhetorical question does not even exist for the majority, it only exists for the child who is rejected. Therefore it is only the rejected child who who ponders this, and therefore learn to think a little deeper than the majority, to give those who do do not fit in, more than a quick judgement.
This does not change when this social group reach adulthood. The violent kids grow up to be rough adults, threatening to `smack` anyone who crosses their path, so noone crosses them, as a result they raise their children to be the same, and it works for them. The `successful` kids, who get to flaunt their latest fashions, who were encouraged to grow up quicker, just to have the `edge` on the other kids, so they can be the coolest, still get to criticise the other adults who don`t fit their `ideal`, and surprise, surprise, their children are 9, going on 30, and the majority of these people are happy, shallow granted, but do you think they notice, or are suffering for it? I think not.
Even I myself, in one short period of my life, when I made friends with two `normal` people, began to behave in a more `popular` manner, it didn`t last, I blew it.
My point is, (sorry I babbled), is the human condition so shallow, and so perverse, that we can only be happy if we disregard others?
Venusxxx
Here`s a question (yes I did check the rules first!)
A person may not PVT without first asking on the main board, the only expection to this is the Sys ops may PM without first asking (if it`s board related)
but, if someone is bothering you, can you PM them without asking? I ask because a) I can`t keep up with the main room at times so may miss an ok from them, and b) I don`t want to yell about pains in the arses` in the main room.
Venusxxx
A person may not PVT without first asking on the main board, the only expection to this is the Sys ops may PM without first asking (if it`s board related)
but, if someone is bothering you, can you PM them without asking? I ask because a) I can`t keep up with the main room at times so may miss an ok from them, and b) I don`t want to yell about pains in the arses` in the main room.
Venusxxx
Quote by RSAB2
If you're looking to hold out till Mars gets home just try thinking non-sexy thoughts...the DaveJ avatar challenge might provide some inspiration!!
Someone who can get his head that far round? That`s supposed to discourage me? How?!
Kind of missed the boat on that thread, it`s enormous now! Will catch up at some point!
Steve, you are ALWAYS drooling, you should see a doctor about that, or put your teeth back in!
Venusxxx
Hope Mars gets home soon.Quote by bluexxx
I know! Alarming or what.... it's all those bloody lurkers! :shock:
Probably the fact that dogging and swinging have been in the media lately..... the Real Wife Swaps people have been in the Sunday press this week, dogging has been in FHM, and in various other papers...........
People get interested and do a google.... they find SH and then they lurk for the rest of their lives cos they can't really believe what they are reading :shock: :shock: :shock:
Nope, don`t buy it. Damn conspiracy theories, it`s I, and my multiple personalities
Damn, they are going to be sooo pissed when they find out I have 140 accounts on here. :mrgreen:
Venusxxx
