Venusxxx
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VenusnMars
Over 90 days ago
Straight Female, 54
Straight Female, 83
Forum
Quote by bob_dasler
you are abit harsh on new comeres in here arnt you ,
after all we are all on this site for a reason arnt we,
im just new to the scene , you all was once wasnt u.
bob
OMG! You don`t think that someone actually took that completely over the top post seriously do you?! :shock:
And Warwick, no pot, (stalk end first), you will need to progress straight to the red jelly however! :twisted:
Venusxxx
:Ok, well I lost my last bit of advice as the thread disappeared, but being the kind and considerate regular I am, I`m happy to offer the advice again....cos I`m nice like that :twisted:
The first thing you have to do, to fit in on here, is to pass the inititation test. If you had looked hard enough, I`m sure you would have come across this somewhere on the site, but as a newbie, I`m sure you couldn`t be arsed, so we shall overlook this for now.
First, you will need to take off all of your clothes, and cover yourself with green jelly. Cut a piece of hardboard out (2ftx2ft) paint `Kick the newbie spanner` onto it, and wear it around your neck. Next, take a walk down to your local garden center....NO! Don`t put a coat on you imbecile, that`s cheating
, however, on account of us not being monsters, you may wear shoes. Once you are there, you will need to purchase a geranium, and stick it, stalk end first, into your bottom. This may be assisted by the use of supporting canes, depending upon your rectal ability. This HAS to stay in place during your walk back home, if it doesn`t, you will have failed, meaning you will have to do this all over again, but using red jelly so everyone knows what a limp-dick failure you were the first time around. This is always best avoided.....you will never quite lose the stigma if this happens.
Once you are home, you will need to take of photo of yourself in this condition, and place it in the Photo ads section. You may have noticed the various complaints about `in your face` cock shots? Well this is why. We need to see green jelly covered men with geraniums up thier rectal passages, NOT cock shots. It`s a simple effort on your part to prove to the members here that you are willing to put the effort in, and are not simply here for a quick fuck. Please try to remember that.
Now that the mechanics are out the way, please let me take this opportunity to welcome you to the site.
I hope you have fun here, and I look forward to seeing your ad soon :mrgreen:
Venusxxx
The first thing you have to do, to fit in on here, is to pass the inititation test. If you had looked hard enough, I`m sure you would have come across this somewhere on the site, but as a newbie, I`m sure you couldn`t be arsed, so we shall overlook this for now.
First, you will need to take off all of your clothes, and cover yourself with green jelly. Cut a piece of hardboard out (2ftx2ft) paint `Kick the newbie spanner` onto it, and wear it around your neck. Next, take a walk down to your local garden center....NO! Don`t put a coat on you imbecile, that`s cheating
, however, on account of us not being monsters, you may wear shoes. Once you are there, you will need to purchase a geranium, and stick it, stalk end first, into your bottom. This may be assisted by the use of supporting canes, depending upon your rectal ability. This HAS to stay in place during your walk back home, if it doesn`t, you will have failed, meaning you will have to do this all over again, but using red jelly so everyone knows what a limp-dick failure you were the first time around. This is always best avoided.....you will never quite lose the stigma if this happens.Once you are home, you will need to take of photo of yourself in this condition, and place it in the Photo ads section. You may have noticed the various complaints about `in your face` cock shots? Well this is why. We need to see green jelly covered men with geraniums up thier rectal passages, NOT cock shots. It`s a simple effort on your part to prove to the members here that you are willing to put the effort in, and are not simply here for a quick fuck. Please try to remember that.
Now that the mechanics are out the way, please let me take this opportunity to welcome you to the site.
I hope you have fun here, and I look forward to seeing your ad soon :mrgreen:
Venusxxx
hi im bob 27 yo male from the walsall area , i a genuine guy who is willing to try MOST things once(nothing to painfull) .
i love just having a good time with people , im pretty well off in the important deptmant and have been told abit of a demon with my tongue.
so singles , couples or aliens contact me bobby d
I`m not sure I want to. He scares me :shock: :scared:
Venusxxx
Quote by lucyslovely
Is this a private party or can anyone join in?
Venusxxx
Venus - you can join in anytime :grin:
I passed a comment on a previous thread .... have a look at http://www.swingingheaven.co.uk/swingers-forum/viewtopic/33009.html
Bob - Mal is full of good advice
and i will have a look at your profile later.Lucy
Awwwwww, does this mean I have to let this one live?!
Venusxxx
hwoar: :twisted: :twisted: :twisted:Quote by Sgt Bilko
Am I ? Who bloody volunteered me for cleaning? Come on, who was it?
You missed a question mark!
Look, look everyone! Freckle missed a question mark! :bounce: :bounce: :bounce:
No wonder the youth of today are going to shit!
Venusxxx
I can see a question mark !! :shock: :shock: :shock: :shock: :shock:
Cheat!
Venusxxx
Quote by ChrisSinc
People only really 'newbie bait' if the newbies sit up and beg for it first. I think its more of a case of you hit them up and I'll knock them down. Badly writen posts on stupid subjectsor by stupid people deserve to be given a good kicking. :twisted:
Hoping noone can see anything wriong with my post
Yes, fuck off you twat!
Venusxxx
I dunno Dean, I`m terrible for hijacking and posting complete crap, but as far as I know, have only had the one thread locked, and that was for inadvertantly breaking very clear rules.
I think the problem the mods have here is trying to please the many. As often as you will find random meaningless topics, you will also find topics started by people who are fed up to the back teeth of random meaningless topics. I think the reasons stated in the original thread were pretty reasonable lines to try to deal with this.
ie. It wasn`t humorous, it was a one off question which would have been ended by the one answer.
Venusxxx
I think the problem the mods have here is trying to please the many. As often as you will find random meaningless topics, you will also find topics started by people who are fed up to the back teeth of random meaningless topics. I think the reasons stated in the original thread were pretty reasonable lines to try to deal with this.
ie. It wasn`t humorous, it was a one off question which would have been ended by the one answer.
Venusxxx
Quote by foxylady 123
Venus, ah but we have to remember that The Witches are the physical embodiment of evil and the The Hobbit is..............................................??
Ah, I see the connection, the witches being the physical symbolism of Macbeth`s evil urges, whereas the Hobbit had the ring....and all the attraction that held, thus yes, it could be supposed that a Hobbit could be sexually attracted to the witches.
Venusxxx
Quote by johnneuk1
Personally I think the entire thread is as funny as fuck, but that`s probably because I`m incorrigible, or twisted, or spend far too much of my time with the lads...or something like that anyway!
Venusxxx
:thumbup: so do IThat is NOT to say I want to be standing anywhere near you when Jags locks this thread........
I`m not THAT stupid.
Venusxxx
