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arkan
Over 90 days ago
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Quote by PoloLady
OK guys, you have just deposited your love juice in your good ladies mouth. As you move back to eye-level with her you notice she has been a messy eater and has dribbled some of your magic willie potion out of the corner of her mouth and it is running down to her chin. She leans towards you to give you a full tonged passionate kiss. What do you do?
Who of you guys is cum-shy?

Why waste it when you can have a sno-ball fight :twisted: smile Better if it's some other guy's though :twisted: :twisted:
You're lucky Red Hot, it's been crap round here lately... Freekin prudes have cottoned on to all the decent sites and complained to the council, who in turn alerted the scuffers, who in turn started patrolling at prime times.
Only been in on one decent episode in about 6 months, and a couple of accidental discoveries... the big one was brill though I must say that, best for ages, and because it was a rarity it was so much more of a buzz... (3 guys and one girl in a Transit if you're curious, and invites later).
Quote by Cicero
You think sitting on your nuts hurts? Try accidently brushing your willy against a stinging nettle whilst having a wee!

Had a Mosquito bite on my dick a fair few years back, that was bloody sore... I'd rolled off her on the river bank and just lit a fag with my tackle soaking up the sun when the little shite struck, wouldn't have minded if he'd blown me instead.
Doubled the size of my dick that did when it puffed up, massive 2 inches afterwards.
Lo Pronto, nice to meet you... Yes as Denise says, have a look on the Dogging forum page, I think you'll find plenty around your way if you're prepared to go out and about and be patient. smile
Lo matty, happy new year and welcome, don't know if I'm allowed to welcome peeps yet, I'm pretty new myself, but hey I'm that kind of guy.
20 inch techie, wow.
Damn you recognised me Gray, it's supposed to be a disguise.
Yea easy, and without bending forward :twisted: lol
(Wouldn't bloody want to, I know where it's been)
Twice as an extra in 'Blakes Seven' episodes (anyone remember it).
Once on BBC interview while attending a rally outside parliament in the 80's.
One once 6 TV Oxford recently interview regarding local tourism.
Quote by JudyTV
I remember someone else being caught out fairly recently in a similar way and hasn't been seen much of since.

I think I know the thread you mean... This one?
Interestingly enough, the copied article in that thread is from the same website as the one in this thread, and it's a very similar piece.
I think C&P is OK if accompanied by some relevant comment of your own, but to just copy a huge great swathe of someone else's work, without acknowledging the source or adding anything original, is just lazy, and could be seen as an attempt to take credit for someone else's work.
Rant over. smile
Have to agree, I'm a bit of a part time author, and write a fair number of erotic and non erotic stories for publication on the web, I recently Google'd my real pen name, (not this one) and discovered several of my free post stories being used by pay sites to attract custom, a more extreme scenario I know, but the principal is the same... Just a "Read this on another site would do in this case" I feel.
Quote by Debbiewebs
Right!!!!!..............any newbie MEN!!!........... that want to get into the cafe...............have to be inpeacted by myself and MISSCHIEF .....OK!

1....... need your inside leg measurments rolleyes
2.......how big is it?? :bounce: :roll:
3......are you shaved? dunno
4......do like doing the can can? :bounce:
5......have you a sence of humor? hump
6.....do you like older women?
:smoke:
7......And any newbie that takes the piss out me spelling.............is out! smackbottom
8 so cum... :roll: ...................on you newbies line up! :bounce:
Now dont all cum at once!. :roll: ................ooo go on then! :bounce:
we are waiting! :bounce:

Hmm... Ok
1: From my arse to the floor generally, unless pissed, then could be anywhere.
2: See 1: :twisted:
3: Occasioanally singed with the friction, but not shaved.
4: Can't can't.
5: If you look like me you have to have one.
6: I'm not into necrophilia thank you. (think that's how it's spelt)
7: Number 6 wasn't a piss take I really wasn't sure.
8: I just did, but if you give me a day or two I'm sure I can get it up again.
Quote by mf_couple
If you follow these guidelines you will be ok
Well the bad news first off single males are 10 a penny, as you will find on all swinger’s web sites and contact magazines, that’s a fact of life. The good news! Yes you are wanted and you can meet some wonderful people, make great friends, and have a good time as well as the brilliant sex with no strings attached. You are here to have fun; the same as the couple or single fem are looking for. You are not a replacement no matter how good you think you are, you are there to help fulfil their fantasies and yours. If you are looking for a relationship then I suggest you try a date line.
So what makes the difference between single males? Why are some more successful then others? Why do some get meet after meet whilst you are still left on the subs bench with your tracksuit on? Strange but believe it or not it has nothing to with being as a sex god, a huge penis or the ability to breathe through your ears (although this can have a distinct advantage). It is all about your attitude and approach to swinging. If you think you have joined the site and will be instantly into sexual heaven, well bad news for you it will take time and the right attitude.
But all is not lost and it may seem a daunting task because people can tend to forget that it is just as nerve racking for you as it is for them. So where do you start?
Your profile, most people will look at your profile after you have mailed them or after a time of chatting in the room. As they say first impressions count and it will be there first chance to look at you. The basic profile outlines what you are looking for and what your interests are. They want to know a bit about the real you and not your cock size, your sexual prowess or how many people you have bedded.
Take your time, this does not mean rewriting War and Peace, just a few lines that are TRUTHFUL and explain a bit about yourself. Try to make this as light hearted as possible, after all this should be fun. Humour and an easy going attitude goes a very long way.
As for your pictures surprise surprise most people and certainly those who are swinging have seen a few cocks in their time and unless it sings tunes, dances or glows in the dark, there is no need to ‘swamp’ your profile with your impressive manhood. Again people want to see the real you, a nice body shot either clothed or unclothed will do and a definite advantage is a facial picture.
Remember swingers come in all shapes and sizes and you should not be afraid to put pictures on. If you are too shy to put on facial pictures you can always say that you can mail them a facial picture and mention this in your profile. If you are not prepared to show facial pictures or any pictures that is up to you. The bottom line is people with facial pictures on get a far better response than those with none on.
So you have designed your profile and now are raring to go and join in this fantastic lifestyle what now? Well there are various ways of getting in contact with people, either through the chat room, by mail, by answering swing dates or requesting to attend parties.
Whichever way you chose it will take time, have patience. It is a bit like chatting someone up in a bar, you would no go up to them and just ask them for a shag (well you might at the risk of wearing your testicals as earrings) people want to get to know you, make sure you are a nice guy that they can have fun with and very important, feel comfortable with. Always remember one thing, whilst you are nervous it can be very daunting for a couple or single female to invite a complete stranger into their house or hotel room to come and have sex with them. Always put yourself in their shoes, always be respectful and under no circumstances ever ever be pushy, as soon as you are you may as well leave, because everyone dislikes a pushy single male with a vengeance.
If you want to meet couples, yes surprise surprise they do come as a couple and the male half does attend; ignore him and you may as well not bother, because you will never meet her, they are in a stable relationship and doing this for fun, even though she will be more than likely making the final decision do not ignore him. No matter what you think she is not going to run off with you just to bonk you, that’s why they are swinging. Besides that you miss the opportunity to make a good friend as well, because this is more than just sex to most people.
So you finally have got a meet arranged. What next? How does it go? What do I do? Well above all else be yourself be truthful and again do not be pushy. You are there to have some fun so keep it light-hearted, but ensure you cover the ground rules, before you start to play. This does not mean that you produce a list of does and don’ts just check the rules. In swinging NO means NO and stick to this. Apart from that you are in for a fun night enjoy it and make sure that they also enjoy it.
Always remember that even though a meet has been arranged this does not automatically mean you will end up having sex. It may well be that there is no ‘chemistry’ between you all. There may be issues that the couple have not spoken about that all of a sudden ‘come to light’ when they finally realise what they are about to do. It happens on a few rare occasions and can be very frustrating for you. After all it has taken you a long time to get to this stage, a lot of talking, messaging etc etc and then it all goes wrong. Again put yourself in theirs shoes, they may well be married, in a long term relationship and are doing this to add some more fun to their life’s. This is their marriage their relationship which they have to live with for a very long time. This is one night for you and after all it is just sex just be a man say thank you do not get involved and walk away, there will be other opportunities.
Who ever said it would be easy, because it is not easy for anyone. These are just a few pointers on how hopefully to be a bit more successful but there is no manual, you have to feel your way (excuse the pun) and do what you feel is right. It is very much like a community and if you are new to it, like moving to a new town it takes time to be accepted. Once you are seen to be nice guy and have had a few meetings then the lifestyle will open up to you and you will have a fantastic time.
Always remember
Be respectful
Be truthful
Be patient
NEVER NEVER be pushy

Jesus Freekin Henry, that's a bunch to remember and live up to, thank fuck I'm not looking biggrin
Quote by hisNher_82_manchester
wave hiya
last year we went on a camping tip had lots of fun! but with me bein home ill :sad: i have sorted out ome of are shit!!
i come across are camping vid after havin alook at it it seem to be that his come across a cpl havin fun in the LAKES :shock:
his be as shy as he is just got up and walke away! and didnt not say anything to me till this day !
so has any one ever come across a cpl havin fun and not know wot to do? :shock:
hers xx

When I was a kid, about 11, mate and me heard a lot of rustling in the woods and some female sounds of distress, she sounded in real pain... crying out, mumbling and moaning, silent spells, then crying out again in a rhythmical sort of manner... Bobby and i rushed to her aid bravely, willing to face any adversity to rescue her.... Wrong!! We stood open mouthed for a few seconds, then her boyfriend saw us and went ballistic at us. biggrin
Quote by foxylady 123
I must say im very dissapointed with all you men out there!!! Up to now i ve only had one volunteer to be measured up
Havnt any of you got any respect for science and the progression of knowledge confused ??

Probably have a job making it to the measuring room love, is it Ok if i send it in the post.
Quiet ok to post it andit really is amazing how little you can get in for standard first class, love
Well it'll never make parcel post rate that's for sure.
Quote by mollyandchris
Lecturing at the local Mollytechnic?

rotflmao :rotflmao: :rotflmao:
Close i'll be lecturing at a prison
Thanks everyone I'm really over the moon about this job
Molly xx
We haven't been introduced... but nice one girl, congrat's cool Lecturing in prison, wow! Let me know which one, I'll see if they'll send me there next time :twisted: biggrin
Quote by foxylady 123
I must say im very dissapointed with all you men out there!!! Up to now i ve only had one volunteer to be measured up
Havnt any of you got any respect for science and the progression of knowledge confused ??

Probably have a job making it to the measuring room love, is it Ok if i send it in the post.
Quote by KandA
I'm very happy with my 7"-8" which is also very thick (hence having an e-name of "fillwell"). As far as I recall, all the women I've made love to have thoroughly enjoyed the completely filled sensation, and virtually all of them can take it all quite comfortably. Alicia likes a very hard shagging from time to time and feels that the sensation of it hitting the cervix isn't too bad.
However, all of that stuff above has very little to do with a woman's can come from fingers, tongues and willies, whether long short thick or thin. And a short willie may very well be better at consistently hitting the g-spot. But remember that the biggest and most effective sex organ is still the brain..
A major downside of having a thick willie is that most of the women I've tried anal with find it just too intimidating / painful.
K (a.k.a. "fillwell")

Quite so about the orgasm friend, pumping it in and out like a steam hammer rarely does it for Lorri, twist it about gently, pull it out every so often and go to work with other bodily parts, then put it back in and call her all the obscene things you can think of, call her a filthy cheating slut whore fit for nothing but fucking all night, and she explodes all over the freekin bedroom.
She also actually get off on the pain side of it, not too much, but give her cervix and internals a moderate bumping, twist it about and stretch her well so it's a bit sore, and she's well on the way up... That applies with the anal as well, she loves it to hurt up the back entry, again not too much, but in moderation... She manages all of my slightly above average Percy and takes all but the final inch of her favourite lover's 9 inch plus tree trunk.
Lo mate, nice to meet you smile Hope you find your dream here wink
Word association game anyone?
Max three words, Min one word. Rules are that each poster must if possible associate their word/comment with the one above. You may use names if you feel the need... and keep it clean or obscene, up to you. (How can you tell I'm freekin bored at work today)
I'll start it off with:
'What a big...'
It's not what you've got, it's how you use it mate... Not boasting just replying to your post, but I can make near 8 inches when really pumped up and forcing it, about 7 maybe a bit less when not so primed up... My lady has a large opening and a large pelvic chamber to match, but most normal sized women can accommodate no more than about 4 to 5 inches before it becomes painful battering the cervix and internals about.
Never thought about it before mate... having been circumcised since birth for medical reasons, I seem to remember drips of lub (pre-cum) as young as 11 when I first started getting a real boner... Fair soaks the pants these days if I've been horny for a while, and dribbles out during a slow toss watching the misses get a seeing to... Of course you can't tell the difference when it's being soaked in the love chamber.
Quote by penfolds06
o arkan thanx mate now want to share the ladies lol ??

Sharing ladies... now you're talking my language mate :twisted: biggrin
Quote by DreamerHelen
I've just downloaded a new Avatar from my first ever bondage session.....
Just wondered what everyone thinks, I think I just look fat in it...but also kind of hot.....maybe....LoL.....
Thoughts please?

Hmm... It's giving me a boner sweet lady, very nice cool
Oh yea Bass Bi's certainly get a wider variety and a lot more fun than so called straight's, we got a lot more to choose from :twisted:
Quote by Debbiewebs
The curiosity came relatively late with me but I managed to satisfy this curiosity in my mid to late teens and I have been trying to satisfy it ever since. My fist reactions to this was I mistakenly thought I may have been gay, I quickly realised I was 50-50 bisexual. Have I been bi all my life? ...not yet, getting there tho :P .
Judy

I have to admit to you!.......that i have Known from the age of 10 that i was kinky purvey! lol
my first fantasied was of being in a big ware house full of women naked bending over and men walking around taking us from behind!....boy i got off loads of times with that thought.......still working on it to become real :twisted: :twisted:
As for bi ...................i was infatuated by me mates the age of 13............ and we hugged a lot !...boy wish it was more :twisted:
It went on to wanting me mates to join in with me and me boyfriends and seeing them shag etc with theres. :twisted: ............will not go on as its endless!.....but funny enough me Dad told me i was kinky at a very young age!.......dident no what he meant at the time .......but i do now :twisted: :twisted:
Umm... now then... Umm... excuse me I have to go and masturbate again................
good the thought turns me on :twisted: :twisted:
Damn you woman... I'm going to be very sore later at this rate... Umm.... back in a minute.
Ughhh!!!! whew.
That's better, now where was I... Oh yes, I'm not a pervert, just slightly disfuctional at times :twisted:
Quote by Debbiewebs
The curiosity came relatively late with me but I managed to satisfy this curiosity in my mid to late teens and I have been trying to satisfy it ever since. My fist reactions to this was I mistakenly thought I may have been gay, I quickly realised I was 50-50 bisexual. Have I been bi all my life? ...not yet, getting there tho :P .
Judy

I have to admit to you!.......that i have Known from the age of 10 that i was kinky purvey! lol
my first fantasied was of being in a big ware house full of women naked bending over and men walking around taking us from behind!....boy i got off loads of times with that thought.......still working on it to become real :twisted: :twisted:
As for bi ...................i was infatuated by me mates the age of 13............ and we hugged a lot !...boy wish it was more :twisted:
It went on to wanting me mates to join in with me and me boyfriends and seeing them shag etc with theres. :twisted: ............will not go on as its endless!.....but funny enough me Dad told me i was kinky at a very young age!.......dident no what he meant at the time .......but i do now :twisted: :twisted:
Umm... now then... Umm... excuse me I have to go and masturbate again................