and avoid camerasSo rely on photos that others have quickly snapped!
My excuse and sticking to it!
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scubamum
Over 90 days ago
Bisexual Female, 57
0 miles · West Midlands
Forum
Warming the Bed
"the closeness, cuddles, kissing and intimacy that it brings"
These shouldn't just be a part of sex but a part of a loving relationship.
If she was feeling wanted and cherished all the time her desires might be a bit higher.
Just a thought!
But as others have said, its not here you will find the answers but by having a conversation with your wife
These shouldn't just be a part of sex but a part of a loving relationship.
If she was feeling wanted and cherished all the time her desires might be a bit higher.
Just a thought!
But as others have said, its not here you will find the answers but by having a conversation with your wife
Warming the Bed
As they said ^^^ honesty is always the best policy. Failing that a sense of humour is the next best thing. Congratulations on making me laugh, reading a profile rarely raises a smile but yours had me giggling away. Although admitting you are 'vanilla' on a swinging site might not be the best phrase ( I know honesty is the best policy) but I understood where you were coming from :-).
So just keep doing what you're doing. xxx
So just keep doing what you're doing. xxx
Warming the Bed
I fell into it in a drunken haze in my mis-gotten youth!(I didn't know they were swingers and naively played strip poker lol can anyone imagine me falling for that now? haha)
Stopped when I was in a relationship with the father of my kids but knew it wasn't as 'satisfying as it could be'. He would never be part of the swinging life!
For years I found as a single fem there are always the occasions when you go to a couples for dinner and someone suggests some-think and the games begin!
My only regret is that I didn't find clubs earlier, about 3 years ago. Chameleons being my favourite!
Now I go when I feel like it and don't when I don't.
Made life so much simpler!
My advice for what it is worth is try a club, just to have a look, or...sometimes just having sex while being watched is enough to fulfil your fantasies! It's certainly easier to handle than all the emailing back and forth and arranging hotel meets that may or may not come off.
Have fun.
ps. cumlady you can pay me £200 to tie your husband up anytime!! And the first one to tell her I'd do it for free is in serious trouble. gggrrrrrr
Stopped when I was in a relationship with the father of my kids but knew it wasn't as 'satisfying as it could be'. He would never be part of the swinging life!
For years I found as a single fem there are always the occasions when you go to a couples for dinner and someone suggests some-think and the games begin!
My only regret is that I didn't find clubs earlier, about 3 years ago. Chameleons being my favourite!
Now I go when I feel like it and don't when I don't.
Made life so much simpler!
My advice for what it is worth is try a club, just to have a look, or...sometimes just having sex while being watched is enough to fulfil your fantasies! It's certainly easier to handle than all the emailing back and forth and arranging hotel meets that may or may not come off.
Have fun.
ps. cumlady you can pay me £200 to tie your husband up anytime!! And the first one to tell her I'd do it for free is in serious trouble. gggrrrrrr
Warming the Bed
If you're looking for couples then Saturday night is a good night,
if you like lots of single guys around then Friday night is good,
if you're looking for bi experiences then I can recommend a Monday.
As for what girls wear, they can do the towels but personally I love my basques ad stockings, so as long as its sexy they tend to be quite relaxed about it.
As for mids-gent, you should have asked in here 'cos the waiting list for single guys is reportedly to be 3 years!
if you like lots of single guys around then Friday night is good,
if you're looking for bi experiences then I can recommend a Monday.
As for what girls wear, they can do the towels but personally I love my basques ad stockings, so as long as its sexy they tend to be quite relaxed about it.
As for mids-gent, you should have asked in here 'cos the waiting list for single guys is reportedly to be 3 years!
Warming the Bed
Wow this post has taken some twists!
I agree so far with most of the posts, age is just a number.
Having been a regular at Chameleons it only dawned on me while reading this post that I will be 50 next year, yet never once have I felt that age while there!
I also started with having upper and lower age ranges that I would not exceed in play partners, both have gone out the window while at chams, it really is just a number!
As for the dressing down when I first went I thought of it as being like on holiday and going to the pool bar in my bikini (worked for me).
I'm, personally, not so keen on Xtasia as a single fem because despite the dressing 'normally' I find the hoards of single men off putting but they may have changed under the new management.
But in both clubs the staff are good at their jobs and make new people feel comfortable and welcome.
As for midscouple reply they are simply asking for clarity on whether you are prepared to swap partners or are more voyeuristic/exhibitionist in looking for a couple to be with you in the same room. Both scenarios can be achieved in a club but other couples you are playing with will want to know the boundaries before going with you!
So its good for you to be clear on them before meeting a couple.
Hope you find what you're looking for. xx
I agree so far with most of the posts, age is just a number.
Having been a regular at Chameleons it only dawned on me while reading this post that I will be 50 next year, yet never once have I felt that age while there!
I also started with having upper and lower age ranges that I would not exceed in play partners, both have gone out the window while at chams, it really is just a number!
As for the dressing down when I first went I thought of it as being like on holiday and going to the pool bar in my bikini (worked for me).
I'm, personally, not so keen on Xtasia as a single fem because despite the dressing 'normally' I find the hoards of single men off putting but they may have changed under the new management.
But in both clubs the staff are good at their jobs and make new people feel comfortable and welcome.
As for midscouple reply they are simply asking for clarity on whether you are prepared to swap partners or are more voyeuristic/exhibitionist in looking for a couple to be with you in the same room. Both scenarios can be achieved in a club but other couples you are playing with will want to know the boundaries before going with you!
So its good for you to be clear on them before meeting a couple.
Hope you find what you're looking for. xx
Warming the Bed
I'll take Ugly > wit and heart.
If they can make me laugh then we'll overcome anything!
Heart second because I want them to care about the things around them but not too sensitive, I don't want them crying at the sunset!!
As for ugly well... my mother always said "The ugly ones are more grateful"
If they can make me laugh then we'll overcome anything!
Heart second because I want them to care about the things around them but not too sensitive, I don't want them crying at the sunset!!
As for ugly well... my mother always said "The ugly ones are more grateful"
Warming the Bed
I agree with skinny, first thing is to be verified as a couple, too many men pretend to be a couple wit a few pics.
Pebble says its not necessary yet they have clear SHREP record for all to see, and personally te first thing I look at is SHREP to see if the person really does exist and meet.
So ask a friendly operative to view you on cam (in a private room if your shy).
Personally I got sick of being asked if I was a female and having to prove it on cam.
(I hate camming). So I Turned up to a social and lots of wonderful things have happened since. The first being that my SHREP filled up, this validated me as a real and genuine female. I've never HAD to go on cam since.
Socials are just what they say on the tin, social events and not the orgy fests some people think they are. I've kissed a lot of people at them but have never played at the them.
The pictures are a different story, when I had a lot of pictures up, I had very few emails or chats in room, when I asked (in chat room) what happened, the feedback in the chatroom was that they were intimidating and too full on. A flick through my pics now will prove that the one of my bust (similar to yours) gets the most response. So I've taken most of my pics down and just left ones that show what I want, couples and ladies.
So yes validate, chat in rooms and if you can get yourself to a social.
xx
Pebble says its not necessary yet they have clear SHREP record for all to see, and personally te first thing I look at is SHREP to see if the person really does exist and meet.
So ask a friendly operative to view you on cam (in a private room if your shy).
Personally I got sick of being asked if I was a female and having to prove it on cam.
(I hate camming). So I Turned up to a social and lots of wonderful things have happened since. The first being that my SHREP filled up, this validated me as a real and genuine female. I've never HAD to go on cam since.
Socials are just what they say on the tin, social events and not the orgy fests some people think they are. I've kissed a lot of people at them but have never played at the them.
The pictures are a different story, when I had a lot of pictures up, I had very few emails or chats in room, when I asked (in chat room) what happened, the feedback in the chatroom was that they were intimidating and too full on. A flick through my pics now will prove that the one of my bust (similar to yours) gets the most response. So I've taken most of my pics down and just left ones that show what I want, couples and ladies.
So yes validate, chat in rooms and if you can get yourself to a social.
xx
Warming the Bed
I totally agree with the response from Midscouple, respect is key to everything.
One line from your post particularly caught my attention.
"The 'chatting up' that I'd usually expect witht he girls in a pub (for example) seems a little superfluous as, when all is said and done, the kit is already off for all concerned. But is that the wrong idea ?..."
As a single fem I would still expect a bit of 'chatting up' just because my kit is off does not mean I am going to shag every man that enters the place. You would still have to appeal to my mind before you ever get near the body. (unless you are a clone of Gerrard Butler in which case keep your mouth shut and let me fulfil my fantasy).
That said...if you're over friendly and invaded my personal space by putting hands on me you would get a very quick sharp rebuke. I would let you know I was interested by putting my hand on you in a friendly gesture first while chatting.
In a similar way if I walk away without asking you to come with me this is a gentle "not interested" so don't be a nuisance and follow me!
Since you've said you had a few drinks before you got there and was a little over exubriant this would also qualify for a 'not a chance' conversation or "walk away" from me as if I wanted sex with a drunk stranger I would be down the local pub!!
Remember people go for specific reasons, exhibitionism, voyeurism, groups, bisexual experiences the list is endless. Just because my kit is off does not necessarily mean I want straight sex with a single guy. (In my case its not what I am at a club for)so you will have to wait for the cues, the friendly hands on, the request to have a little walk the wink and nod.
Hope that helps a little xx
One line from your post particularly caught my attention.
"The 'chatting up' that I'd usually expect witht he girls in a pub (for example) seems a little superfluous as, when all is said and done, the kit is already off for all concerned. But is that the wrong idea ?..."
As a single fem I would still expect a bit of 'chatting up' just because my kit is off does not mean I am going to shag every man that enters the place. You would still have to appeal to my mind before you ever get near the body. (unless you are a clone of Gerrard Butler in which case keep your mouth shut and let me fulfil my fantasy).
That said...if you're over friendly and invaded my personal space by putting hands on me you would get a very quick sharp rebuke. I would let you know I was interested by putting my hand on you in a friendly gesture first while chatting.
In a similar way if I walk away without asking you to come with me this is a gentle "not interested" so don't be a nuisance and follow me!
Since you've said you had a few drinks before you got there and was a little over exubriant this would also qualify for a 'not a chance' conversation or "walk away" from me as if I wanted sex with a drunk stranger I would be down the local pub!!
Remember people go for specific reasons, exhibitionism, voyeurism, groups, bisexual experiences the list is endless. Just because my kit is off does not necessarily mean I want straight sex with a single guy. (In my case its not what I am at a club for)so you will have to wait for the cues, the friendly hands on, the request to have a little walk the wink and nod.
Hope that helps a little xx
Warming the Bed
Depending on when it is I'd come.
But I thought you were asking what would interest people and you've had few responses to the question. I guess this is because you know the area best. Are there many swinging venues down there for people to attend?
I like socials because coming from the Midlands it makes a change to keep my clothes on :-) But if there are few venues down there a little bit naughtier might be nice!
There again the newbies might find that intimidating, a social tends to attract a more diverse range of people...... oh I could go on!
Someone local answer Kats questions please!
But I thought you were asking what would interest people and you've had few responses to the question. I guess this is because you know the area best. Are there many swinging venues down there for people to attend?
I like socials because coming from the Midlands it makes a change to keep my clothes on :-) But if there are few venues down there a little bit naughtier might be nice!
There again the newbies might find that intimidating, a social tends to attract a more diverse range of people...... oh I could go on!
Someone local answer Kats questions please!
Warming the Bed
Hi, I went for the first visit to Chams on a Sunday afternoon, not too many people around, got my bearings and chatted to lots of people but didn't play because I felt sick with nerves.
However, didn't take me long to get over the nerves as I returned the following night (Monday for bi night) and have been going ever since!
It's really up to you what you do and how far you want to go, but if you do go at quieter times the staff have more time to show you around and make you feel at ease! They are very helpful and will do that, but obviously Friday night is very busy so probably not the best night to ask the staff to help you out!
Have fun xx
However, didn't take me long to get over the nerves as I returned the following night (Monday for bi night) and have been going ever since!
It's really up to you what you do and how far you want to go, but if you do go at quieter times the staff have more time to show you around and make you feel at ease! They are very helpful and will do that, but obviously Friday night is very busy so probably not the best night to ask the staff to help you out!
Have fun xx
Warming the Bed
Personally I can't think of anything sexier than when a woman squirts on my face 'cos I know I'm getting it right and really turning her on!
I have seen, in a club, one man run in horror from a squirter but that just showed his lack of experience and as with the above post everyone just laughed at him and his lack of understanding!
Unfortunately I'm not squirter but there's a challenge to anyone who would like to try and make me :wink:
I have seen, in a club, one man run in horror from a squirter but that just showed his lack of experience and as with the above post everyone just laughed at him and his lack of understanding!
Unfortunately I'm not squirter but there's a challenge to anyone who would like to try and make me
:wink:
Warming the Bed
If you're experienced with FFM then an MFM or MMF will be fine. Just imagine one of the fems from your previous experiences has a strap on! lol
I think its important to remember though, as the fem in the group its your rules and boundaries that are abided by and just go with what you are comfortable with. Lads can get a little exuberant at times, or go the other extreme and be so respectful they won't push boundaries lol
Have fun and enjoy
xx
I think its important to remember though, as the fem in the group its your rules and boundaries that are abided by and just go with what you are comfortable with. Lads can get a little exuberant at times, or go the other extreme and be so respectful they won't push boundaries lol
Have fun and enjoy
xx
Warming the Bed
Birmingham magistrates bench court 6 and the dock of court 13
The helicopter pad of a cruise liner but that was just bloody windy lol
and I did have a pair of vibrating knickers years ago that activated randomly, thought they were crap till they started vibrating while in the queue with my trolley in ASDA, nearly passed out on that occasion lol
The helicopter pad of a cruise liner but that was just bloody windy lol
and I did have a pair of vibrating knickers years ago that activated randomly, thought they were crap till they started vibrating while in the queue with my trolley in ASDA, nearly passed out on that occasion lol
Warming the Bed
I have to agree with Nem, from the pics I got the impression its a sub male you want and after you've used and abused my fella I'm not getting a lot of satisfaction am I?
The fun of bi couples playing is that their are no boundaries and worries, I only play with bi males because I like seeing 2 guys playing, same as I like to see 2 girls playing and a mf play, but I can't play intimately with you so there are huge boundaries!
However, having said that I have just put my pics into a private album as while they were being perved and wanked over, I was getting very few emails. Now I have one pic the emails and chat are back again. Maybe, while we think the photos are fun and reflect our nature most people do find them intimidating. I know I initially shied way from anyone in 'bondage' attire.
As for Mandy, she is just a sex goddess so don't think that is anywhere near an issue.
I would try a bi night at a club if I was you, and if you're ever near Brum then Monday night at Chameleons has got to be my favourite night.
xxxxx
The fun of bi couples playing is that their are no boundaries and worries, I only play with bi males because I like seeing 2 guys playing, same as I like to see 2 girls playing and a mf play, but I can't play intimately with you so there are huge boundaries!
However, having said that I have just put my pics into a private album as while they were being perved and wanked over, I was getting very few emails. Now I have one pic the emails and chat are back again. Maybe, while we think the photos are fun and reflect our nature most people do find them intimidating. I know I initially shied way from anyone in 'bondage' attire.
As for Mandy, she is just a sex goddess so don't think that is anywhere near an issue.
I would try a bi night at a club if I was you, and if you're ever near Brum then Monday night at Chameleons has got to be my favourite night.
xxxxx
Warming the Bed
Swinging, love my lingerie! so which came first? I've never now nor will I in the future be into naturism as I much prefer the mystery of 'hidden gems'.
How did I get into it? Was lead astray of course!
The Egyptians and Babylonians predate Romans by at least a 1000 years and also enjoyed their orgies, so only the term 'swinging' is new and that follows on from the thrusting gyrating hips of the roaring 30's swing music and the loose morales that went with the depression and then World War. So not even as modern as the 60's and 70's, definitely not coined I my life time lol.
How did I get into it? Was lead astray of course!
The Egyptians and Babylonians predate Romans by at least a 1000 years and also enjoyed their orgies, so only the term 'swinging' is new and that follows on from the thrusting gyrating hips of the roaring 30's swing music and the loose morales that went with the depression and then World War. So not even as modern as the 60's and 70's, definitely not coined I my life time lol.
Warming the Bed
Back to original post lol
As a single fem I prefer to meet in a club, first time at least, just for the safety aspect!
I can't accomodate as have kids, and don't fancy going to a guys home as I don't know what I'm walking in to! I have heard tales of 5 guys being there when a single girl has arranged a meet!!
I'm also free to say not thanks in a club without ruining the night for both of us!
xx
just my tuppence worth as usual
As a single fem I prefer to meet in a club, first time at least, just for the safety aspect!
I can't accomodate as have kids, and don't fancy going to a guys home as I don't know what I'm walking in to! I have heard tales of 5 guys being there when a single girl has arranged a meet!!
I'm also free to say not thanks in a club without ruining the night for both of us!
xx
just my tuppence worth as usual
Warming the Bed
I agree with all that's been said above, I always check shrep, I know some people hide it, but it works for me!
Socials are probably the best way to meet people, but so is chatting in a room, not just whispering individuals, I rarely answer a whisper!
I have also blocked all friends requests and winks just because they are so irritating.
Like you I have no idea why they want me as a friend when we've never had a conversation.
Persevere there are great people on here, but like life, you have to take the rough with the smooth so to speak.
Have fun!
xx
Socials are probably the best way to meet people, but so is chatting in a room, not just whispering individuals, I rarely answer a whisper!
I have also blocked all friends requests and winks just because they are so irritating.
Like you I have no idea why they want me as a friend when we've never had a conversation.
Persevere there are great people on here, but like life, you have to take the rough with the smooth so to speak.
Have fun!
xx
