Quote by sexyann57
I,M GOING.........on another girlie night out to liverpool in a stretch limo again...this time all dressed as St, Trinians
:happy: :cheers: :beer::bounce: :bounce:
Last time you were all Policewomen!
Whatever next Ann?!!
Join the most popular community of UK swingers now
Login
Flirty__Fruitcake
Over 90 days ago
Male
Forum
Quote by sexyann57
PS:Love the idea of Heat Lump Hallmark's cards Ann!
buti,ll need someone to rub cream on them Flirty
:thumbup:Ann!Such a saucy suggestive post!Now I know why they call you..............................................................DARE I write it............................................................................................................57
Wow!Haven't seen that cover in years Sprited - another of those amazing Hipgnosis cover you see the one they did of all the painted naked ladies with all the Pink Floyd covers on their backs?
I've been playing "Houses of the Holy" loads since Spirited Aways been using THAT pic for his postings.
Clearly I am easily influenced by the subliminal powers of the Avatar.
So,whatever you do SA - don't change it to Max Bygraves Greatest Hits!
PS:Love the idea of Heat Lump Hallmark's cards Ann!
Clearly I am easily influenced by the subliminal powers of the Avatar.
So,whatever you do SA - don't change it to Max Bygraves Greatest Hits!
PS:Love the idea of Heat Lump Hallmark's cards Ann!
Quote by fruity1976
Absurd Dido the Dildo? or ADD for short - though I bet its rather long actually!?
I think my dildo may have ADD actually it seems to shake and jump about a lot!? :P
And it wont stay in the same place/position for more than 2 seconds either!!
Surely that just ADD's to the fun Fruity!!!!?
To know that you both KNOW is the best,yes Little the whole charm to an evening out or a quiet night in,that its all going to lead to that wonderful shared pleasure that..OOOO! :cry:
.. can't go on writing this post as its in the past tense for me and,in darker moments,its a touch like Scrapheap Heaven for us over 40s single guys
But there is always hope
.. can't go on writing this post as its in the past tense for me and,in darker moments,its a touch like Scrapheap Heaven for us over 40s single guys
But there is always hope
Vix,Fruity - you are not alone in this,oh no - there comes a time in courtship -consummation - closeness when - you have to go for a poo! 
I utterly deny thats what I'm leaving the king sized vibrating pink satin sheeted bed :shock: to do though - of course!
One goes to the bathroom,flushes BEFORE doing it,runs taps etc to cover up the sordid fact that one has to go for a..
ops: 
And yes Vix - the paper trick too!
I utterly deny thats what I'm leaving the king sized vibrating pink satin sheeted bed :shock: to do though - of course!
One goes to the bathroom,flushes BEFORE doing it,runs taps etc to cover up the sordid fact that one has to go for a..
ops: And yes Vix - the paper trick too!
My head is full of half assed memories and concepts Fruity!
Anyway - yes - useless inventions - on another thread I mentioned a mobile phone that had an electric toothbrush attachment - I'm sure I saw an actual prototype of that on TV,done as an example of a perfectly possible but utterly pointless anyone else see that?
Anyway - yes - useless inventions - on another thread I mentioned a mobile phone that had an electric toothbrush attachment - I'm sure I saw an actual prototype of that on TV,done as an example of a perfectly possible but utterly pointless anyone else see that?
Actually..Neil is right.
If its worth doing once ..and the more you do..and the more Shredded Wheat you eat
And sex isn't just an erection is it?
Sex begins with a smile,or an affectionate glance,or a hand on your hand across a table in a crowded restaurant.
Your problems begin if you start doing this in a crowded restaurant:
Everybody will want to join in.
Except the women with the men wearing Lynx Africa - they'll be off in a hastily hailed taxi to the nearest airport to board the first available flight to Uganda.
If its worth doing once ..and the more you do..and the more Shredded Wheat you eat
And sex isn't just an erection is it?
Sex begins with a smile,or an affectionate glance,or a hand on your hand across a table in a crowded restaurant.
Your problems begin if you start doing this in a crowded restaurant:
Everybody will want to join in.
Except the women with the men wearing Lynx Africa - they'll be off in a hastily hailed taxi to the nearest airport to board the first available flight to Uganda.
Now there'll be someone on here who knows more about it than me - from my hazy memory - Reich was a German Scientist based in the US - He built the O - Orgone box - you got in it and it absorbed your orgasmic energy or something.
The US authorities ended up putting him in a mental hospital where he died a broken really believed in his sexual energy theories but was regarded as a danger to American morals in the prudish 1950's.
The US authorities ended up putting him in a mental hospital where he died a broken really believed in his sexual energy theories but was regarded as a danger to American morals in the prudish 1950's.
Two addictive things at play here - the internet and sex.
You become obsessed with it,you end up staring at a 15 inch screen for hours,writing post after post after post,and sending dozens of PMs -
- and then theres the internet as well - 
:wanker:
Thats why I'm sticking to having sex like how I'm doing here now
You become obsessed with it,you end up staring at a 15 inch screen for hours,writing post after post after post,and sending dozens of PMs -
- and then theres the internet as well -
:wanker: Thats why I'm sticking to having sex like how I'm doing here now
You're right computerbar,this isn't related to singing at all.
You'll find that the general opinion amongst the forum is that the best diet for sex is Shredded Wheat.
The spray I'd use is Lynx - try their one called can't control themselves when they smell it - they HAVE to touch it.ops:
If you use Africa however women go off and book flights to damn flusterating for the man and very bewildering for the they recover from the effects of the whiff of Lynx Africa they're in Kenya or Nigeria or SA or wherever,totally bewildered as to how they got there - and without any luggage!
You'll find that the general opinion amongst the forum is that the best diet for sex is Shredded Wheat.
The spray I'd use is Lynx - try their one called can't control themselves when they smell it - they HAVE to touch it.
ops: If you use Africa however women go off and book flights to damn flusterating for the man and very bewildering for the they recover from the effects of the whiff of Lynx Africa they're in Kenya or Nigeria or SA or wherever,totally bewildered as to how they got there - and without any luggage!
In reply to Little Gem's typically thoughtful post - I've mostly had loads of fun on here in recent weks and many of you have helped me through a difficult time not that you knew that.
I have had my moments of doubt and get very concerned about putting my foot in it or offending you post or PM you have to take risks but as long as there's no deliberate malice intended I think its fine as long as things can be cleared up between whoever!
The thing that hasn't happened to me yet is actually meeting some of you - I nearly did on Saturday but had practical and personal reasons why I couldn't make the munch.
I realise meeting can lead to everything or nothing - or something in between.
We are flawed human beings so I imagine theres all kinds of consequences to all this,some good,some..not so good.
I see no evidence that its going downhill here.
In fact to give you an amazing example - many members of the board have PM'd me to say they won't have sex while I'm online as they know that means I'm all alone at my PC - it concerns them that I'm being left out so they don't do it while I am on here reading and what Swinging Heaven is all about - nobody on the forum having sex until I go offline.
Now I know that that sounds egotistical but at least this new Flirty Fruitcake forum name has humbled me a I was posting as Swinging Heaven it kind of went to my head,everything and everybody seemed to revolve around me.
Thank God all thats behind me now.
I have had my moments of doubt and get very concerned about putting my foot in it or offending you post or PM you have to take risks but as long as there's no deliberate malice intended I think its fine as long as things can be cleared up between whoever!
The thing that hasn't happened to me yet is actually meeting some of you - I nearly did on Saturday but had practical and personal reasons why I couldn't make the munch.
I realise meeting can lead to everything or nothing - or something in between.
We are flawed human beings so I imagine theres all kinds of consequences to all this,some good,some..not so good.
I see no evidence that its going downhill here.
In fact to give you an amazing example - many members of the board have PM'd me to say they won't have sex while I'm online as they know that means I'm all alone at my PC - it concerns them that I'm being left out so they don't do it while I am on here reading and what Swinging Heaven is all about - nobody on the forum having sex until I go offline.
Now I know that that sounds egotistical but at least this new Flirty Fruitcake forum name has humbled me a I was posting as Swinging Heaven it kind of went to my head,everything and everybody seemed to revolve around me.
Thank God all thats behind me now.
