I had an Uncle who was the World Heath Organisation man in charge of the pacific.
He was based in manilla and his first job was to try and halt the spread of AIDS by dispensing 100 million American condoms
Reports started coming in that the condoms were coming off during intercourse and tests found that the american ones were far too big for the asian penis :shock:
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Geminifemale
Over 90 days ago
Bisexual Female, 65
0 miles · West Midlands
Forum
Quote by Sassy-Seren
'Wanker' when it doesn't want to play
So its a male then? lol
I sometimes slip into the Fawlty Towers sketch, when he is beating the bonnet of the car with a branch and start saying ' Thats it, ive warned you for the last time, im having the last word and switching you off"
STRESS
Ive been chronically exhausted and stressed for quite some time and now im getting more and more coughs and colds to the point where my cough wont go and i cant sleep. Ive had to take a few days off work and im bored watching daytime tv
For some unexplicable reason, ive just decided to do some ironing and just spent the past hour enjoying it very much.
Also the thought of spending some quality time in the kichen is very appealing and im looking forward to doing something creative this afternoon
Apart from the obvious guys wanking and the girls shopping, what do you like to do out of the ordinary for stress therapy or just to relax?
For some unexplicable reason, ive just decided to do some ironing and just spent the past hour enjoying it very much.
Also the thought of spending some quality time in the kichen is very appealing and im looking forward to doing something creative this afternoon
Apart from the obvious guys wanking and the girls shopping, what do you like to do out of the ordinary for stress therapy or just to relax?
I saw a health programme a few months ago, which was dealing with the rumours that the NHS might consider restricting treatment to overweight people
The cut off figure was a BMI of 30 and above. So to prove the stupidity of this, they checked out a rugby team. Most of the guys were well over the 30 yet extreemly fit and healthy. Muscle weighs heavier than fat and therefore works againt you in the calculation
The cut off figure was a BMI of 30 and above. So to prove the stupidity of this, they checked out a rugby team. Most of the guys were well over the 30 yet extreemly fit and healthy. Muscle weighs heavier than fat and therefore works againt you in the calculation
Sorry jaymar, im a litle confused at times so I guess everyone else must be confused as to which way im going.
Yes ive been gay all my adult life, but in the last few yrs ive become more interrested in men.
So in answer to your confusion, its HE not SHE, and I am old, this is the oldest ive ever been
Yes ive been gay all my adult life, but in the last few yrs ive become more interrested in men.
So in answer to your confusion, its HE not SHE, and I am old, this is the oldest ive ever been
i met a guy last yr who i fancied in every way. He fancied me too but wouldnt make a move. As weeks went by, i went from being coy to begging him to make a move and a month ago he confessed he had no confidence and felt i was out of his league.
I dont think im attractive at all, im shy, fat old and wrinkled, but i try to ignore how i feel and bluff like everyone else does
I dont think im attractive at all, im shy, fat old and wrinkled, but i try to ignore how i feel and bluff like everyone else does
Quote by robbie_rob
a few years ago,well about 10 years ago there was a rashy of novelty ciders out alongside the usual k cider etc,i fondly remember one called piggy saw a beer at a festival last year called cripple cock! ive not been the same since!
Cripple Cock is still going, made just south of Bristol
My whole life is evolving and always has been. Swinging is just the latest thing to try and possibly keep doing. Its already helped improve my confidence as ive been painfully shy for most of my life and wouldnt get naked never mind have sex naked in public
Its even starting to make me reconsider relationships with men and im so glad i am
Its even starting to make me reconsider relationships with men and im so glad i am
I went to my first club last saturday and far from being scared, i just loved every moment. I couldnt see the need for clothes within moments of getting in the door.
Having sex in front of strangers and walking round naked just seems such a natural thing to do
I went with a couple but soon made new friends too. i cant wait to go to the next.
Any takers?
Having sex in front of strangers and walking round naked just seems such a natural thing to do
I went with a couple but soon made new friends too. i cant wait to go to the next.
Any takers?
Quote byYes the word is Germanic. The meaning is; intercourse. Any other use of the word is just course!
In the old days when fax's used to do the rounds, i received one about the word fuck. I cant remember word for word but it was a very funny and informative explanation
Fuck is a word for all seasons, it can be used to illustrate and describe many situations, thoughts and feelings -
I'll be fucked if i do
What the fuck?
For fucks sake
Fuck me
You sly old fucker!
You fucking twat
Now im fucked
Im fucked
your fucked
hes fucked
shes fucked
we are fucked
they are fucked
Je suis fucked
Toi a fucked
il a fucked
elle a fucked
Nous avons fucked
Vous aves fucked
Il sont fucked
Elle sont fucked
And many more, im no English language expert, but its a word for every possible occasion and if used wisely with purpose, inflection and intonation, i think that far from being rude or offensive, it compliments the English language fucking brilliantly.
Fuck, i think is from ancient German, .....ficken? (sp) - To fertilise
It is among the oldest words in the English language. Like many words, if fell into poor use when a bunch of welsh arrived in 1066.Diolch ein fawr
Quote by LondonPlaything
Gemini, that reminds me of a time I was working *on the buildings* in chelsea... chihuahua owners everywhere, you know the deal...
one such owner, teetering down the road, tiny dog on expensive string... fur stoll >?sp< etc etc (owner, not mini-dog)...
the pocket-puppy must have veered wildly and aggressively off course towards something on the pavement which the elderly Lady took offence to...
in a very refined voice, perfect pronounciation and enunciation, the words carrying bautifully and fully along the quiet tree-lined avenue:
Jemima!... put. that. dowwwn!... at once!..... you little c*nt!
never have a buncha builders blushed so!
lp
Fucking priceless
You couldnt make it up!!Your eyes are a bit distracting
I was offended by Gordons constant out bursts at first, but hes a passionate guy, he believes in his work and expresses his frustrations with this word
I was farm manager for a wealthy titled family who also trained national hunt horses.
We had horses running at one course in york, and the family went up to see a favorite run.
After going over one fence, the jockey almost went over the handlebars, but managed to get seated again. Much to my shock, Lady * shouted "Well fucking seated jonny"
I was farm manager for a wealthy titled family who also trained national hunt horses.
We had horses running at one course in york, and the family went up to see a favorite run.
After going over one fence, the jockey almost went over the handlebars, but managed to get seated again. Much to my shock, Lady * shouted "Well fucking seated jonny"
Im not particularly religious, but as i go through life, i remember more and more the phrases from the bible i learned in sunday school
By thy sins ye shall be found out.
Says a lot to me, why try and con someone cos you know your gonna get caught out in the end.
I remember a work mate telling me a story bout him and 3 other lads who went on a weekend break. One lad had a stutter, robbobbin was his name.
On saturday night they went to a disco to pull and Robbobbin got lucky with a real stunner, blue eyes, blonde, long legs right to the top etc and best of all, her sporty car parked out side. They drove off to a layby and he was busy snogging, caressing, moved lower and found the lump.
It cured his stutter.
But what did S/he think was going to happen with a straight guy?
" oh well love, your gorgeous so it doesnt matter, im shagging you anyway?"
I dont think so
By thy sins ye shall be found out.
Says a lot to me, why try and con someone cos you know your gonna get caught out in the end.
I remember a work mate telling me a story bout him and 3 other lads who went on a weekend break. One lad had a stutter, robbobbin was his name.
On saturday night they went to a disco to pull and Robbobbin got lucky with a real stunner, blue eyes, blonde, long legs right to the top etc and best of all, her sporty car parked out side. They drove off to a layby and he was busy snogging, caressing, moved lower and found the lump.
It cured his stutter.
But what did S/he think was going to happen with a straight guy?
" oh well love, your gorgeous so it doesnt matter, im shagging you anyway?"
I dont think so
Quote by jaymar
It's not nice I know, esp. when you've built up a rapport with that person, have you seen pics?
It also makes me wonder, are there any men profiles on here who are actually women?? It could go both ways couldn't it?
It can go both ways i guess, although the male mind has the greater propensity to be deviant
Look at paedophiles, majority are male although you do occasionally get the likes of hindley and west joining in
What started making me suspicious was this one was more than normally interested in talking about the very fine detail of what im wearing and what my fantasies are, in every last detail.
Things like fantasies are best discussed eye to eye, not on msn
She was on line earlier, most upset at my suggestion shes a he. He protested innocence and asked me to give her a chance to prove who she is.
I phoned her again at that moment- no answer.
Then she/he went off line.
This happened to me at new year, except he sent me an email confessing everything, thinking i would take pity cos of the cancer remission and the ex wife had taken the kids , the dog had died etc etc.
In the old days when fax's used to do the rounds, i received one about the word fuck. I cant remember word for word but it was a very funny and informative explanation
Fuck is a word for all seasons, it can be used to illustrate and describe many situations, thoughts and feelings -
I'll be fucked if i do
What the fuck?
For fucks sake
Fuck me
You sly old fucker!
You fucking twat
Now im fucked
Im fucked
your fucked
hes fucked
shes fucked
we are fucked
they are fucked
Je suis fucked
Toi a fucked
il a fucked
elle a fucked
Nous avons fucked
Vous aves fucked
Il sont fucked
Elle sont fucked
And many more, im no English language expert, but its a word for every possible occasion and if used wisely with purpose, inflection and intonation, i think that far from being rude or offensive, it compliments the English language fucking brilliantly.
Fuck, i think is from ancient German, .....ficken? (sp) - To fertilise
Fuck is a word for all seasons, it can be used to illustrate and describe many situations, thoughts and feelings -
I'll be fucked if i do
What the fuck?
For fucks sake
Fuck me
You sly old fucker!
You fucking twat
Now im fucked
Im fucked
your fucked
hes fucked
shes fucked
we are fucked
they are fucked
Je suis fucked
Toi a fucked
il a fucked
elle a fucked
Nous avons fucked
Vous aves fucked
Il sont fucked
Elle sont fucked
And many more, im no English language expert, but its a word for every possible occasion and if used wisely with purpose, inflection and intonation, i think that far from being rude or offensive, it compliments the English language fucking brilliantly.
Fuck, i think is from ancient German, .....ficken? (sp) - To fertilise
Why do men pretend to be women?
I was messaged 2 weeks ago by a gorgeous looking girl. We have chatted via MSN and exchanged phone numbers, but then the games started. She would just disapear mid sentance and come back later with an excuse about mum coming into her room. Then I rang her and there were some muffled sounds and then it went dead. Seconds later a text with some excuse.
Then more chat on msn, i asked her to prove shes real, ........an indignant reply saying if i didnt trust her its my fault.
I smelled a rat. Lunch time today i phoned again and a man answered and said i had the wrong number.
I havent named her, but shes on SH, so, admin, when you take a members payment, what steps do you take to verify that person is who they say they are?
If thats not practicable, would you consider a private way of naming and shaming?
Im not going into why men pretend to be women, its a sick world and i just wish they would play with their own twisted kind and leave truthful people alone.
I was messaged 2 weeks ago by a gorgeous looking girl. We have chatted via MSN and exchanged phone numbers, but then the games started. She would just disapear mid sentance and come back later with an excuse about mum coming into her room. Then I rang her and there were some muffled sounds and then it went dead. Seconds later a text with some excuse.
Then more chat on msn, i asked her to prove shes real, ........an indignant reply saying if i didnt trust her its my fault.
I smelled a rat. Lunch time today i phoned again and a man answered and said i had the wrong number.
I havent named her, but shes on SH, so, admin, when you take a members payment, what steps do you take to verify that person is who they say they are?
If thats not practicable, would you consider a private way of naming and shaming?
Im not going into why men pretend to be women, its a sick world and i just wish they would play with their own twisted kind and leave truthful people alone.
