after a bit more thinking...
29) Automatically censor off-site links and e-mail addresses
30) Make smileys optional - so I can choose to have 'lol' and 'brb' in letters rather than as pictures when I type them.
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Mr_D_and_HotTart
Over 90 days ago
Bisexual Male, 56
Bisexual Female, 61
0 miles · Hereford and Worcester
Forum
Insomnia strikes... a 5am ramble follows...
1) Fix sound bug with Mac OSX, sound is currently heavily distorted and pitch-shifted 1 octave down.
2) Volume control for each user... so I can have 'loudbloke' always turned down, and 'quietbird' always turned up, without having to set it each time.
3) An equivalent to IRC's 'killghost' function, which would fix the 5 minute wait problem.
4) Ability to find friends (ie go to whichever room they are in), but ONLY if they have made you a friend too.
5) Resizable cam windows (including the ability to watch more than 1 cam, and the ability to get rid of the 'my cam' window for people who dont own one)
6) Ability to resize text globally, and an option to turn all text colours off.
7) Automatically warn/kick/ban users typing ALL IN UPPERCASE, users repeating the same text 3 times or 'flooding' in IRC terminology.
8) Ability to sort userlists by gender/alphabetically/by length of time in room (this last one will cut out the constant jumping of lists we have to suffer in busy rooms)
9) Ability to restrict recieving whispers to friends only, and option to turn off incoming whispers totally.
10) If the dual purpose whisper/proflie button is to remain, have a confirmation dialogue that asks 'are you sure' the first time you whisper someone, and offers the option to say whatever you just typed to the room instead (which is what I usually meant to do after looking at a profile!)
11) unfakeable 'paste last whisper to whole room'. This would allow a user to tell the room what a slimeball just whispered. The unfakeability can simply be achieved by having the forwarded whisper appear in a font or with an indent that cant be done any other way.
12) List of most viewed cams. This would stop people trawling through hundreds of rooms to find the best 'show'
13) Multiple room ops. The room owner can give room op status to anyone, and if the owner leaves, ownership passes to the person who has been op the longest.
13) indication of who the room ops are, and an indication given to kicked users that they have been kicked, and the reason why if the op gives one.
14) 'Warn privately' and 'warn publically' buttons for ops.
15) Kick button warns instead of kicking if the user has not yet been warned (means ops can't break the 'no kick without warning' rule)
16) Ability for room owners to password rooms at any time, not just when creating them, and to unpassword rooms.
17) Ability for room owners to make rooms 'no whispering' or 'no cams' at any time (and to switch these options off if they choose)
18) Ability for room owners to do the equivalent of mode +m in IRC, ie silence all non-ops
19) Ability to whisper mutual friends (ie they have 'friended' you AND you have friended them) even if they are in a different room.
20) 'Away' button should be more prominent, turn the user's cam off temporarily - this should help with the 'empty chair' bandwidth drain, and reduce the amount of enforcement needed from ops.
21) Show users avatar (or profile pic?) in the cam window if the don't have their cam on.
22) Allow users 'putting on a show' to choose to make their camera visible to people in other rooms (this should solve the problem of rooms being full of non-talking cam viewers, and the '70' limit)
23) 'report cam to mods' button (for room owners only?). This would send a still of the current image on cam to the mods, in the same way that photo ads can currently be reported for breaking the site rules.
24) 'report user to mods' button (for room owners only?). This would send the last 60 seconds of text to the mods.
25) Remember the text colour I last used, so I don't have to set it each time.
26) Auto-away for anyone who has been silent for more than 15 minutes (or any other suitable length of time)
27) (needs a rule change) Give ops the ability to kick anyone without warning if they have not spoken for over 30 minutes/1 hour/whatever.
28) 'open the room I opened before' feature. If I had a room open yesterday with 3 other people given op status, let me re-open it the same way, with the same name quickly.
1) Fix sound bug with Mac OSX, sound is currently heavily distorted and pitch-shifted 1 octave down.
2) Volume control for each user... so I can have 'loudbloke' always turned down, and 'quietbird' always turned up, without having to set it each time.
3) An equivalent to IRC's 'killghost' function, which would fix the 5 minute wait problem.
4) Ability to find friends (ie go to whichever room they are in), but ONLY if they have made you a friend too.
5) Resizable cam windows (including the ability to watch more than 1 cam, and the ability to get rid of the 'my cam' window for people who dont own one)
6) Ability to resize text globally, and an option to turn all text colours off.
7) Automatically warn/kick/ban users typing ALL IN UPPERCASE, users repeating the same text 3 times or 'flooding' in IRC terminology.
8) Ability to sort userlists by gender/alphabetically/by length of time in room (this last one will cut out the constant jumping of lists we have to suffer in busy rooms)
9) Ability to restrict recieving whispers to friends only, and option to turn off incoming whispers totally.
10) If the dual purpose whisper/proflie button is to remain, have a confirmation dialogue that asks 'are you sure' the first time you whisper someone, and offers the option to say whatever you just typed to the room instead (which is what I usually meant to do after looking at a profile!)
11) unfakeable 'paste last whisper to whole room'. This would allow a user to tell the room what a slimeball just whispered. The unfakeability can simply be achieved by having the forwarded whisper appear in a font or with an indent that cant be done any other way.
12) List of most viewed cams. This would stop people trawling through hundreds of rooms to find the best 'show'
13) Multiple room ops. The room owner can give room op status to anyone, and if the owner leaves, ownership passes to the person who has been op the longest.
13) indication of who the room ops are, and an indication given to kicked users that they have been kicked, and the reason why if the op gives one.
14) 'Warn privately' and 'warn publically' buttons for ops.
15) Kick button warns instead of kicking if the user has not yet been warned (means ops can't break the 'no kick without warning' rule)
16) Ability for room owners to password rooms at any time, not just when creating them, and to unpassword rooms.
17) Ability for room owners to make rooms 'no whispering' or 'no cams' at any time (and to switch these options off if they choose)
18) Ability for room owners to do the equivalent of mode +m in IRC, ie silence all non-ops
19) Ability to whisper mutual friends (ie they have 'friended' you AND you have friended them) even if they are in a different room.
20) 'Away' button should be more prominent, turn the user's cam off temporarily - this should help with the 'empty chair' bandwidth drain, and reduce the amount of enforcement needed from ops.
21) Show users avatar (or profile pic?) in the cam window if the don't have their cam on.
22) Allow users 'putting on a show' to choose to make their camera visible to people in other rooms (this should solve the problem of rooms being full of non-talking cam viewers, and the '70' limit)
23) 'report cam to mods' button (for room owners only?). This would send a still of the current image on cam to the mods, in the same way that photo ads can currently be reported for breaking the site rules.
24) 'report user to mods' button (for room owners only?). This would send the last 60 seconds of text to the mods.
25) Remember the text colour I last used, so I don't have to set it each time.
26) Auto-away for anyone who has been silent for more than 15 minutes (or any other suitable length of time)
27) (needs a rule change) Give ops the ability to kick anyone without warning if they have not spoken for over 30 minutes/1 hour/whatever.
28) 'open the room I opened before' feature. If I had a room open yesterday with 3 other people given op status, let me re-open it the same way, with the same name quickly.
One of the several "first rule of swinging"s is "be tolerant"... and it's generally applied to tolerance of people who have different tastes to you. I think this applies to the orignal poster in two ways, firstly the original poster should be welcomed with open arms, by all an sundry, as they seem to be very nice, able to string a sentence together etc... but secondly it means the original poster also has to be tolerant of people whos personal tastes mean they dont want to play with them.*
I think you are not getting the response you want because you are new, and not very well known round here, not because of your plumbing!
Personally, as someone who loves playing with breasts, and loves playing with cocks, I have 'playing with a transexual or three' pretty high up on my wish list :twisted:
* god that was a messy sentence, I wish I'd paid more attention earlier on in the thread where she made it clear she wanted to be referred to as 'she', it took me ages to word that without gender-specific pronouns!
I think you are not getting the response you want because you are new, and not very well known round here, not because of your plumbing!
Personally, as someone who loves playing with breasts, and loves playing with cocks, I have 'playing with a transexual or three' pretty high up on my wish list :twisted:
* god that was a messy sentence, I wish I'd paid more attention earlier on in the thread where she made it clear she wanted to be referred to as 'she', it took me ages to word that without gender-specific pronouns!
Quote by DeeCee
..."losing the erection" when using condoms thing... ive had this happen... but only when using Durex condoms.... theyre just too tight... i prefer to use Mates instead...
I have exactly the opposite experience, I dont get on with Mates at all, but have no problems with Durex. I suggest if anyone reading suffers from this issue, shop around a bit until you find a brand that fits rather than giving up and potentially regretting it for the reat of your shortened life.
An interesting subject...
This goes back to the core of swinging: sex and love are 2 different things. If that's not something your head or your heart is content with, might I suggest you follow the helpful link at the top of the page to Heaven Dating!
I think the important thing is that the person who is having attachment issues realises it's *them* who has the issue, not the object of their unrequited love. If the object of your desire wants no strings attached, then that's what's on offer... unless they happen to feel the same way after sepending time with you.
Having said that, affection often develops, and if it is mutual, then so much the better! We do have our fair share of romantic success stories round here, but that's got a lot more to do with the fact that we have a lot of wonderful people round here who enjoy spending time together than anything else!
This goes back to the core of swinging: sex and love are 2 different things. If that's not something your head or your heart is content with, might I suggest you follow the helpful link at the top of the page to Heaven Dating!
I think the important thing is that the person who is having attachment issues realises it's *them* who has the issue, not the object of their unrequited love. If the object of your desire wants no strings attached, then that's what's on offer... unless they happen to feel the same way after sepending time with you.
Having said that, affection often develops, and if it is mutual, then so much the better! We do have our fair share of romantic success stories round here, but that's got a lot more to do with the fact that we have a lot of wonderful people round here who enjoy spending time together than anything else!
Quote by Heavendating
"We couldnt find an ideal partner for you so we have come up with this matches that may be of interest:"
admin
Hmmm, I was rather hoping for a rich spinster with a heart condition.... but any port in a storm!
Seriously though, seeing as dating sites seem to suffer from an abundance of people wanting a quick shag, and a few people round here seem to be wanting a relationship that goes beyond that, there might be good synergy here (oh dear, I used the word "synergy"... must be working on too many business presentations!).
Hope all works out for you, Kiss_Me. I suspect this is just some evil person making things up to scare you, rather than someone who actually has any real information on you.
Just to clear up any potential confusion about this part of your message...
This is a reference to an scam advert that used to pop up all over the net, which tried to scare people into buying useless software. There is no such thing as "Broadcasting an IP address", and if you did somehow stop your computer using the IP address system, it would be totally unable to get information from the internet!
While it sometimes is possible to do a bit of looking up locations from IP adresses, they generally resolve to your ISP's address, not yours. If you want to see how precisely you can be located from an IP address, take a look here:
All it says about my location is "London", and it then says I'm 16 miles from the part of london I'm actually in, so it's not very precise... and it's fiendishly difficult for one user of SH to find another user's IP unless you've used the old-style IRC chat, or communicated by some other method outside the site.
Just to clear up any potential confusion about this part of your message...
Quote by Kiss_Me
...make sure your computer is properly secure and not broadcasting your IP address
This is a reference to an scam advert that used to pop up all over the net, which tried to scare people into buying useless software. There is no such thing as "Broadcasting an IP address", and if you did somehow stop your computer using the IP address system, it would be totally unable to get information from the internet!
While it sometimes is possible to do a bit of looking up locations from IP adresses, they generally resolve to your ISP's address, not yours. If you want to see how precisely you can be located from an IP address, take a look here:
All it says about my location is "London", and it then says I'm 16 miles from the part of london I'm actually in, so it's not very precise... and it's fiendishly difficult for one user of SH to find another user's IP unless you've used the old-style IRC chat, or communicated by some other method outside the site.
Maybe I'm old fashioned but I find the badly spelt or txt-mdg style ones the most offputting, so I find 9inchdik4u far worse than 9inchdickforyou.
Oh and the 'no girl or boy in your chat name' rule applied to the old text-based chatroom, which let you choose a different name to your forum one, which is why it's not being enforced anymore. Personally I'd like this one back, but it would mean extending it to forum names too, so a lot of people would have to be renamed.
Oh and the 'no girl or boy in your chat name' rule applied to the old text-based chatroom, which let you choose a different name to your forum one, which is why it's not being enforced anymore. Personally I'd like this one back, but it would mean extending it to forum names too, so a lot of people would have to be renamed.
Whispering is a way of taliking to just one person in the chatroom, so nobody else can see. It's useful between friends, but it can be higly irritating if you do it to a complete stranger without asking first.
To whisper, click on the name of the person you want to whisper to in the list on the right, and you'll see the "chat to all" words change to "whispering to (persons name)". Your messages will now only be seen by that person, until you either pick someone else from the list, or choose "chat to all" at the top of the list to stop whispering.
To whisper, click on the name of the person you want to whisper to in the list on the right, and you'll see the "chat to all" words change to "whispering to (persons name)". Your messages will now only be seen by that person, until you either pick someone else from the list, or choose "chat to all" at the top of the list to stop whispering.
Some things to think about...
If either of you is in any way squeamish about same-sex-fun, then ask the organisers if the party is 100% straight or not. If it's not, then be sure you are mentally prepared so see that sort of thing without expressing any displeasure. Tolerance is rule no.2
"No means no" is of course rule no. 1, do not hesitate to invoke rule 1 where necessary, you must never feel that more experienced party goers can get you to to do anything you are not happy with.
Set your boundaries by agreement between yourselves in advance. Decide your policy on condom usage, playing apart, and everything else you can think of beforehand and stick to it.
I hope you enjoy yourselves :-)
If either of you is in any way squeamish about same-sex-fun, then ask the organisers if the party is 100% straight or not. If it's not, then be sure you are mentally prepared so see that sort of thing without expressing any displeasure. Tolerance is rule no.2
"No means no" is of course rule no. 1, do not hesitate to invoke rule 1 where necessary, you must never feel that more experienced party goers can get you to to do anything you are not happy with.
Set your boundaries by agreement between yourselves in advance. Decide your policy on condom usage, playing apart, and everything else you can think of beforehand and stick to it.
I hope you enjoy yourselves :-)
Quote by Kiss_Me
Well.... while we're on the subject! Would the developers ever consider an option where you could use 'Flash' chat or just basic 'HTML' chat as Macromedia isn't supported on a home/work network/server.
Flash is a program made by the company called Macromedia, so asking for Flash but not Macromedia is like trying to buy a Golf that isn't a Volkswagen.
HTML is the language all web pages are written in, but it's not possible to write any sort of chat program using just HTML.
Lots of good points raised in this very interesting thread - thanks to all who have contributed for a damn good read.
I guess there is a big issue around the meaning of ' fantasy'. I have no problem with people wanting to play victim, or those willing to help them live out their fantasy, and absolutley no tolerance whatsoever for people who fantasise about committing an illegal, non-consensual act.
Personally, having flirted with the BDSM scene, it seems I have a lot more tolerance for fantasy play than most, so I think that some of the negative reaction to fantasies seen on this thread is more a fear of the unknown than a fear of the practices themselves.
I've taken part in this sort of thing from both sides, to a mild extent, and it can be immensely pleasureable, as long as everyone knows it's the 'play victim's' fantasy that is being acted out and not the 'play attacker's' fantasy.
Further down the road, are consensual acts that involve strangers. I'm not offended or repulsed by the idea of wanting to involve strangers, getting rid of all the emotional baggage involved and concentrating on the pure physicality of the act is something that attracts me.
I find it odd that people here accept the idea of sex with strangers at swinging clubs, and the idea of fantasy play with trusted partners, but don't accept the idea of fantasy play with strangers. Isn't this exactly the sort of intolerance to sexual freedom we all object to from the vanilla world?
I guess there is a big issue around the meaning of ' fantasy'. I have no problem with people wanting to play victim, or those willing to help them live out their fantasy, and absolutley no tolerance whatsoever for people who fantasise about committing an illegal, non-consensual act.
Personally, having flirted with the BDSM scene, it seems I have a lot more tolerance for fantasy play than most, so I think that some of the negative reaction to fantasies seen on this thread is more a fear of the unknown than a fear of the practices themselves.
I've taken part in this sort of thing from both sides, to a mild extent, and it can be immensely pleasureable, as long as everyone knows it's the 'play victim's' fantasy that is being acted out and not the 'play attacker's' fantasy.
Further down the road, are consensual acts that involve strangers. I'm not offended or repulsed by the idea of wanting to involve strangers, getting rid of all the emotional baggage involved and concentrating on the pure physicality of the act is something that attracts me.
I find it odd that people here accept the idea of sex with strangers at swinging clubs, and the idea of fantasy play with trusted partners, but don't accept the idea of fantasy play with strangers. Isn't this exactly the sort of intolerance to sexual freedom we all object to from the vanilla world?
The short answer... Yes
The long answer: I do find it a bit strange when there are 10 people in a room chatting about the weather, and one on cam wobbling the wand, but it's their choice to show, and my choice to watch or not.
I do like to see a nice big hard cock, and you can see some quite impressive sights around here if you wade through all the cams (you may wish to use the impromptu measurement scale some of us have devised - one hander/two hander/finger and thumb only).
In the right context, such as the gay/bi wank room, or rooms where women are actively encouraging it, then I have even been known to join in the chicken choking, but uually more with a view to arranging a meet than making a mess on my keyboard.
Personally, I almost always have my cam on my face, and I'd personally consider it rude to publically make my own mayo when nobody has expressed an interest, but each to their own... and if you do want to see my trousersnake, you only have to smile nicely and ask :-)
What I really don't get is the blokes who fiddle with something obviously flaccid on cam - is this meant to impress anyone? If not, why do it?
The long answer: I do find it a bit strange when there are 10 people in a room chatting about the weather, and one on cam wobbling the wand, but it's their choice to show, and my choice to watch or not.
I do like to see a nice big hard cock, and you can see some quite impressive sights around here if you wade through all the cams (you may wish to use the impromptu measurement scale some of us have devised - one hander/two hander/finger and thumb only).
In the right context, such as the gay/bi wank room, or rooms where women are actively encouraging it, then I have even been known to join in the chicken choking, but uually more with a view to arranging a meet than making a mess on my keyboard.
Personally, I almost always have my cam on my face, and I'd personally consider it rude to publically make my own mayo when nobody has expressed an interest, but each to their own... and if you do want to see my trousersnake, you only have to smile nicely and ask :-)
What I really don't get is the blokes who fiddle with something obviously flaccid on cam - is this meant to impress anyone? If not, why do it?
Quote by little gem
Soooo, this gallery..... where would that be then? Or have I spectacularly missed an entire pervin..... erm... I mean browsing opportunity? ;)
See the bit at the top of every page that says "photo ads voice ads forum chatroom clubs & parties dogging gallery" in white text on a blue background? The gallery is cleverly hidden behind the last option :-)
I've never been a great drinker, partly because beer tastes horrible (come on, admit it guys, no peer pressure to pretend you like it here!) partly because I have never built up much of a tolerance for alcohol, but mostly because I just get slightly silly (oh alright, sillier if you prefer) and then fall asleep. Could I do without it? Well I once realised, as I was sipping a glass of white wine with Christmas dinner, that the last time I had any alcohol was with the same meal the year before, so I think I'm a yes!
Caffine, on the other hand, I'm wedded to for all eternity. I did go cold turkey for a long time, after realising that I had a serious problem with the quanltity I was drinking, but now I know to treat caffine with respect, I'm self-medicating nicely
...and on that note, I'm off for a cuppa
Caffine, on the other hand, I'm wedded to for all eternity. I did go cold turkey for a long time, after realising that I had a serious problem with the quanltity I was drinking, but now I know to treat caffine with respect, I'm self-medicating nicely
...and on that note, I'm off for a cuppa
I believe the forum software has an option to turn off viewing sigs (If you are not logged in, you can't see sigs), but I can't find the button anywhere - it used to be next to the one to turn off your own sig... perhaps the button has been lost in the re-design of the site? Perhaps a Mod could ask admin about it 
I use Firefox's Adblock extension to hide some of the bigger and more irritating pictures in sigs... and the whole of sloganizer amongs others!
I use Firefox's Adblock extension to hide some of the bigger and more irritating pictures in sigs... and the whole of sloganizer amongs others!
Until the UK finally gets some sensible laws on what can and can't be broadcast, I recommend avoiding pay per view TV unless you are very squeamish about seeing genitalia.
If there was an option in the poll for using bittorrent and a large porn torrent site that I won't mention here, I'd be going for that (please note I'm NOT asking for another poll option!) - with a million films and dozens of specialist subgenres out there, the chances of the best thing to float your boat being on at the right time is slim to say the least.
If there was an option in the poll for using bittorrent and a large porn torrent site that I won't mention here, I'd be going for that (please note I'm NOT asking for another poll option!) - with a million films and dozens of specialist subgenres out there, the chances of the best thing to float your boat being on at the right time is slim to say the least.
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