Talking is one thing, doing is another. You both have to feel comfortable for something to happen.
Do you feel like you want to have sex with her? Does she know it? Is there chemistry/sexual tension between you two when you are close to each other? Have you tried running the back of your finger against her cheek, looking her deep in the eyes and saying something like 'you do look so lovely tonight'? Have you held her hands? Did she let you or did she draw back? Have you whispered in her ear? Have you played with her hair?
What I am trying to say here is you have to make your intentions clear. She could be just shy or unsure of how you feel about her. Or she could like you as a friend and nothing more. Whatever you do, do it with gusto so that you have nothing to feel embarrassed about later if it turns out she is not interested in taking things further.
I hope you two soon sort your feelings out. All the best!
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Tania
Over 90 days ago
Straight Female, 59
0 miles · Greater London
Forum
Quote by de_sade
Hey, why not go the whole hog and organise a whole series of such events FFS. We could have :
Yankee soldiers and the Vietcong
Night-club bouncers and solitary female
Nazi Stormtropers and the Jewish refugees
Policemen (+truncheons) and the drunken party-goer
Ted Bundy and the College Co-eds
Sorry, I don't think this is a suitable subject for such jocularity.
Making the situation of something to laugh and joke about simply perpetuates the myth that is not that serious a crime.
It is.
Tania you should be ashamed of yourself.
De_sade
Dear De_sade
For a man who has used the name of the most notorious pervert in the world as a handle, you are far too judgemental of others. I believe that you have not read the entire thread carefully before picking up on something I said and making a big deal of it.
For your information, Markz asked if men can be . The answer implied by my response was that yes, they can be . It was a tongue in cheek suggestion to show him how and I am sure he at least has taken it in the spirit it was meant. I feel you have missed the entire point of clinguist's fantasy role play idea. So please put away your torch of fire and quit the witchhunt. I have done nothing to be ashamed of, at least not this time!
Regards
Quote by hisandhers
Ski69- its not the responsability of the munch organisers to tell people who they can & can't talk to :shock: next you'll be saying that some one should be in charge of who we meet & shag
What a brilliant idea! Let someone else make the choices and everyone has to comply with the munch organiser's decisions. Now that would guarantee mesome action!
Quote by keeno
The worst thing is I think I still like her. You know my head tells me the way it is but the rest of me , well, as I said still has feelings. Jesus, she does this every couple of months.
Is this normal???
Yes, Keeno, it is normal and it takes a long time to get over someone and even if you do, it is never completely.
Anyway, if it makes you feel any better, I am having a bad day too. I had been making plans for a long weekend being encouraged by someone I had been communicating with online but now he's disappeared. I wish I hadn't spent so much money (that I cannot really afford) preparing myself for this weekend of lust Now who is going to see my nice new nails and appreciate all the effort I went into?
I guess people enjoy mind games. Or maybe they take a fantasy a wee bit too far and then back down in shame when they realise what they've done. But I am sick and tired of basing my happiness on other people's ability to deliver it. Surely there must be a better way in life!
Quote by ski69
thing is went out last friday, and the barman said "lady ove there said do u wanna buy her a drink??".
Wow! Do bartenders play cupid nowadays? I would rather die of thirst before I asked anyone to buy me a drink or told the bartender to ask a man for me. But maybe she wasn't so much of a lady? I have always said that reading the SH forums is educational!
Quote by clinguist
to try and bring a lighter note to this thread....
how about a group of fun friendly people get together, in period dress and re-enact a viking raidBut without the burning or stabbing...
Ladies all dressed as maidens with long braids, and the men as the viking raiding party :)
Are you organising such an event? If so, wait for my return in autumn. I would make a great Valkyrie* and could show Markz how men can be !
*as the maiden parts would all be played by nubile swinger fems, I had to invent a role for me
Actually naughtynymphos, some people who have experienced a form of sexual attack end up fantasising about it, reworking the scenario in their heads till it makes sense, attempting to gain some control over a situation that happened long ago and cannot be changed.
Missy, I think what you really wanted out of that play acting was to experience loss of control. I bet you are a very strong-willed woman in your everyday life who always gets what she wants so you elected to give up control for a while to relax your spirit.
Missy, I think what you really wanted out of that play acting was to experience loss of control. I bet you are a very strong-willed woman in your everyday life who always gets what she wants so you elected to give up control for a while to relax your spirit.
I've had a meet off the chatroom, nice gentleman, too. But most people visiting there seem to be living their fantasy online and not really likely to show up when invited. I think you will have better chances if you become a regular in the chatroom and start to realise who the other regulars are and build a rapport with them. It takes patience.
Well I went to a club recently and like you did not know what to expect and how to proceed. I think the trick is to be respectful and keep your hands to yourself till invited by a persistent stare and a smile. Even so, don't jump in, smile, talk, get to know the people who have invited you to join them and then tell them you are inexperienced and not sure how to proceed and I am sure they will guide you. Good luck!
Two reasons:
1. Your profile has only got pics of your wife
2. Your profile text puts greater emphasis on seeking people for your wife
We can't know what someone looks like unless he posts his pics and we cannot know what he wants to do unless he verbalises it.
Hopefully once you address these issues, people will come flocking.
1. Your profile has only got pics of your wife
2. Your profile text puts greater emphasis on seeking people for your wife
We can't know what someone looks like unless he posts his pics and we cannot know what he wants to do unless he verbalises it.
Hopefully once you address these issues, people will come flocking.
OK Jas, thank you for the advice. Of course you are right about not spilling the beans, I hadn't thought of it this way in my excitement.
Unfortunately my FB/Purveyor of Pleasure/lover/friend - call him what you like - does not feel comfortable swinging himself although he doesn't mind me doing it.
I do apologise to the men that met me last week if I have offended them with my behaviour.
Unfortunately my FB/Purveyor of Pleasure/lover/friend - call him what you like - does not feel comfortable swinging himself although he doesn't mind me doing it.
I do apologise to the men that met me last week if I have offended them with my behaviour.
Quote by Jas-Tim
You have friends who you sleep with regularly - why is this NSA not classed as swinging in your eyes?
I always considered swinging to be an activity that couples do, something formal associated with going to clubs or private parties. I thought swinging was done within a group of friends, not on a one-night stand basis with total strangers. I don't think I have the hang of it yet. I think I am just dipping my toes in the water as opposed to swimming properly without armbands in the open sea. I am probably wrong about everything, let me think about things a bit more.
Quote by Darkfire
edited, cos these posts & your post history make absolutely no sense. You're not a newbie, so I'm confused :doh:
I considered myself a newbie because I had had no swinging experience. I never said I was not sexually experienced or that I am not aware of medical issues, etc. Hope this clarifies things.
Hi Steve
Why don't you drop by the Black on White room and its other reincarnations one evening? There are some nice people hanging out in there, e.g. a guy called oralgift who is always decent and people seem to like a lot. Then there is Clementine who always manages to put a smile on my face as she is a wild minx but has a heart of gold. Whoreandhub is a nice couple and whore is witty and has a lovely smile then there is Xander who has his cam and mic on but sometimes delays answering and the effects are hillarious (he plays the guitar like you). Sometimes the atmosphere in the room is sexy and sometimes is plain good fun with people teasing each other. And you won't have to say anything if you don't feel comfortable talking, just sit and follow the conversations, they are often hillarious.
London Steve's room is also good and you might try Mike's room (as I am sure I will after hearing good things about it).
As for the TV room, TVs are gentle people and very accepting of others, so I don't blame you for feeling cosier there but please PLEASE don't jump to the other side as there may be a few women in here who want your body...
Why don't you drop by the Black on White room and its other reincarnations one evening? There are some nice people hanging out in there, e.g. a guy called oralgift who is always decent and people seem to like a lot. Then there is Clementine who always manages to put a smile on my face as she is a wild minx but has a heart of gold. Whoreandhub is a nice couple and whore is witty and has a lovely smile then there is Xander who has his cam and mic on but sometimes delays answering and the effects are hillarious (he plays the guitar like you). Sometimes the atmosphere in the room is sexy and sometimes is plain good fun with people teasing each other. And you won't have to say anything if you don't feel comfortable talking, just sit and follow the conversations, they are often hillarious.
London Steve's room is also good and you might try Mike's room (as I am sure I will after hearing good things about it).
As for the TV room, TVs are gentle people and very accepting of others, so I don't blame you for feeling cosier there but please PLEASE don't jump to the other side as there may be a few women in here who want your body...
Good piece of advice dirtytwo. I think the word you were thinking of is 'psyche' - the soul.
Well I know a lot more about myself now than I did a week ago. That alone was worth facing the SH firing squad.
It would have been nice if one of the seasoned swingers here had taken me under wing as I had advertised for a long time ago but people are not interested in newbies and that is life. So of course I went out and made my own mistakes and learned from them.
What makes me laugh is I lost a guy who I was really attracted to because I didn't want to sleep with him on a first date lest he thought badly of me. (I am sure people can do a search and find out about that incident...)
I have been fired upon for wanting a relationshipand again for seeking NSA sex. I can't win, whatever I do. I need someone to teach me the right balance. Perhaps one day he'll come by SH and take me by the hand.
...wondering whether I have met niceandgentle and not remember it! :shock:
Well I know a lot more about myself now than I did a week ago. That alone was worth facing the SH firing squad.
It would have been nice if one of the seasoned swingers here had taken me under wing as I had advertised for a long time ago but people are not interested in newbies and that is life. So of course I went out and made my own mistakes and learned from them.
What makes me laugh is I lost a guy who I was really attracted to because I didn't want to sleep with him on a first date lest he thought badly of me. (I am sure people can do a search and find out about that incident...)
I have been fired upon for wanting a relationshipand again for seeking NSA sex. I can't win, whatever I do.
I need someone to teach me the right balance. Perhaps one day he'll come by SH and take me by the hand....wondering whether I have met niceandgentle and not remember it! :shock:
I don't think any of the guys involved would mind, it is another feather on their cap (isn't that the expression?) Besides I have not identified them and I doubt they will ever remember they once met me. It was all too brief and insignificant for them.
I was not boasting. I was seriously worried about my voracious appetite but now everything is clear to me.
All I wanted was to hear what others had experienced when they first began swinging. Did they go on a rampage or was it a slow controlled progress? The 'should I see a doctor' question was tongue in cheek and I was hoping people would say 'no, you are normal, it happens like this to a first-timer' or 'yes, you should, we don't do such things in here, you little hussy'
I was not boasting. I was seriously worried about my voracious appetite but now everything is clear to me.
All I wanted was to hear what others had experienced when they first began swinging. Did they go on a rampage or was it a slow controlled progress? The 'should I see a doctor' question was tongue in cheek and I was hoping people would say 'no, you are normal, it happens like this to a first-timer' or 'yes, you should, we don't do such things in here, you little hussy'
Blood, sweat and tears can mean a lot of things.
Perhaps it is a route for the transmission of infections
Perhaps it is what medical personnel have to go through to qualify for practice
Having said that it may be more interesting to choose 'To Be or Not to Be' as your topic of discussion - to be or not to be emotionally involved with the patients you are caring for. Is medicine a cold-hearted profession or should it be mellower as it is dealing with live beings who have emotions, not just physical and mental needs? Will a patient get better faster if treated as an individual not as a disease or interesting case?
Hope the above helps you build your presentation. Good luck.
Perhaps it is a route for the transmission of infections
Perhaps it is what medical personnel have to go through to qualify for practice
Having said that it may be more interesting to choose 'To Be or Not to Be' as your topic of discussion - to be or not to be emotionally involved with the patients you are caring for. Is medicine a cold-hearted profession or should it be mellower as it is dealing with live beings who have emotions, not just physical and mental needs? Will a patient get better faster if treated as an individual not as a disease or interesting case?
Hope the above helps you build your presentation. Good luck.
