oh yes indeedy mike......
i think i do get myself into trouble with my gob at least once a day m8......
but then again its got me praise as well.....
its just all the waffle and dribble inbetween the 2 that pisses people off lol...
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51...old....is it buggery 
i wouldnt claim to know every 1 m8 but i think youll find thats not an age that people consider old....
yes this is the SH site as such and youve posted in the right place.....which....is more than i do sometimes....specially after a night on the lash and gety back and try to post something (no pun intended there postie)...
i think youll find that if you post a bit m8 and maybe join in with other peoples threads and above all....dont expect this (as some do) to turn into a quick shag line....take your time m8.....maybe use the chatroom......then maybe move onto meeting people at a social......advertised in the LMU section of the forum.....
if you have any problems ask a mod (the really helpful people who run the forum/site/chatroom etc...
good luck m8 ...
dargento
ps .....whats wrong with slippers and fire anyway :shock: ...and ...i can be talked into a tartan blanket quite easily........(specially if tatty is under it )
i wouldnt claim to know every 1 m8 but i think youll find thats not an age that people consider old....
yes this is the SH site as such and youve posted in the right place.....which....is more than i do sometimes....specially after a night on the lash and gety back and try to post something (no pun intended there postie)...
i think youll find that if you post a bit m8 and maybe join in with other peoples threads and above all....dont expect this (as some do) to turn into a quick shag line....take your time m8.....maybe use the chatroom......then maybe move onto meeting people at a social......advertised in the LMU section of the forum.....
if you have any problems ask a mod (the really helpful people who run the forum/site/chatroom etc...
good luck m8 ...
dargento
ps .....whats wrong with slippers and fire anyway :shock: ...and ...i can be talked into a tartan blanket quite easily........(specially if tatty is under it )
ahem (in a quiet but respectful dulcet tone)
GARRRRLIC BREAD
thnak you to the lovely party......it was just what i like ....a nice quiet affair lol.....
but seriously....redgirlmanc and will32 was great to meet you 2 and to see the look on wills and reds face at the amount of thrashing bluexxx can take lol......and she sat all the way home and didnt squirm once :shock: ....
even though i had to drive and was banned from the alcohol i got high on great conversation.....super other things and ringos....
will see you soon 1 would hope at gingerjo-lees party next saturday......
ps blue are you serious about the ball gag???
:shock: :shock: :shock:
:D
GARRRRLIC BREAD
thnak you to the lovely party......it was just what i like ....a nice quiet affair lol.....
but seriously....redgirlmanc and will32 was great to meet you 2 and to see the look on wills and reds face at the amount of thrashing bluexxx can take lol......and she sat all the way home and didnt squirm once :shock: ....
even though i had to drive and was banned from the alcohol i got high on great conversation.....super other things and ringos
....will see you soon 1 would hope at gingerjo-lees party next saturday......
ps blue are you serious about the ball gag???
:shock: :shock: :shock:
:D oooooooooooooo the alarm......i used to love them......where are they playing at????
68 guns....
where were you hiding ...etc...etc..etc
i was famous at 1 time round here when i worked security at a club and hoofed alex (hurricane) higgins out for grabbing a bar girl by the boobs.....
he didnt really say much and i was dissapointed he didnt challenge me to a frame or 2 on the green baize.........
68 guns....
where were you hiding ...etc...etc..etc
i was famous at 1 time round here when i worked security at a club and hoofed alex (hurricane) higgins out for grabbing a bar girl by the boobs.....
he didnt really say much and i was dissapointed he didnt challenge me to a frame or 2 on the green baize.........
hi there every 1....
lovely day isnt it....
did you know that the average humidity recorded in florida this time of year is still upto 86%.....................
:shock: :shock: :shock:
sorry ....got carried away with the bloody stats again.....mind you my topic of statistical reference is just as interesting as his.....
:lol: :lol:
tbh m8tey.....the stats and percentages mean nothing at all......apart from that theres more male swingers than women.....did any 1 realise this?????
oh and yeah....more guys are after a quick shag too (nice 1 FB) :lol:
lovely day isnt it....
did you know that the average humidity recorded in florida this time of year is still upto 86%.....................
:shock: :shock: :shock:
sorry ....got carried away with the bloody stats again.....mind you my topic of statistical reference is just as interesting as his.....
:lol: :lol: tbh m8tey.....the stats and percentages mean nothing at all......apart from that theres more male swingers than women.....did any 1 realise this?????
oh and yeah....more guys are after a quick shag too (nice 1 FB) :lol:
liecester this year......
i was asked by a lovely lady who i had met a short time before and knew lots of people from SH.....
scenario 1 .......i was very quiet and modest.......spoke fleetingly to other attendees......sat in a corner drinking a small vodka tonic all night nodding politely at passers by......
scenario 2......i burst into my first munch somewhat akin to a cowboy film with all guns blazing.......met lots of really great people from SH who were out for a real good time and who were catching up with old friends and making new 1s......i had a real scream and crawled into my hotel room at about 4am after the club.......
still talk regularly to a lot of people i met and am looking forward to meeting them again......well.......not bothered about happy cats and postie.......1 sleeps in a camper van......the other is a postman :D :D :D :D
ps love them really....not in a physical sense of the word though
i was asked by a lovely lady who i had met a short time before and knew lots of people from SH.....
scenario 1 .......i was very quiet and modest.......spoke fleetingly to other attendees......sat in a corner drinking a small vodka tonic all night nodding politely at passers by......
scenario 2......i burst into my first munch somewhat akin to a cowboy film with all guns blazing.......met lots of really great people from SH who were out for a real good time and who were catching up with old friends and making new 1s......i had a real scream and crawled into my hotel room at about 4am after the club.......
still talk regularly to a lot of people i met and am looking forward to meeting them again......well.......not bothered about happy cats and postie.......1 sleeps in a camper van......the other is a postman
:D :D :D :D ps love them really....not in a physical sense of the word though
heat up a glass bottle.....not too hot so it will burn though.....
place the top of the bottle over the offending spot....
as the bottle cools it will suck out all the yucky cack in your spot.....
warnings.....dont keep it there too long or you get a big red ring around the spot.....
remember not to let any 1 see you doing this.....as you will look like a genie trying to get back in your bottle.... :shock:
place the top of the bottle over the offending spot....
as the bottle cools it will suck out all the yucky cack in your spot.....
warnings.....dont keep it there too long or you get a big red ring around the spot.....
remember not to let any 1 see you doing this.....as you will look like a genie trying to get back in your bottle.... :shock:
oh...so its joke hijack time....ok here goes...
a woman rushes into the vets holding a duck...the duck is very floppy and its eyes are closed....
"quick"cries the woman "my pet duck has collapsed"
shes rushed straight through to the examination room and a vet immediately comes in and goes to work........1 stethoscope examination later the vet looks sadly at the woman and tells her the duck has passed away.....
"NOOOOO" cries the woman " its the kids favourite pet duck....are you absolutely positive ....arent there more tests you could do to make certain......i mean....it could be in a coma...etc....etc...etc
the vet rolls his eyes and exits the room.....1 minute later he returns with a labrador dog....he takes off its lead and the labrador jumps up onto the table and sniffs the duck for a good 2 minutes....sits down...looks at the vet and shakes its head sadly....
the vet replaces the lead and takes the dog out of the room...he reenters and a cat enters with him....the cat jumps up and like the dog sniffs the duck for a good 2 minutes....sits down and looks at the vet....shaking its head sadly...
the vet lets the cat out of the room and says to the woman..."as i said mam your duck has passed away".....the woman laments the duck....expressing her worries over her childrens reactions.....the vet apologises but says that due to the "duck" emergency he now has a full waiting room...he asks the woman if he should post the bill to her...
the lady says that she would pay now and is presented with the bill.....
£250 QUID she yells....for telling me my ducks dead?????
no says the vet......that service was £12 ....you asked for further tests.......the rest is for the LAB REPORT and the CAT SCAN...........................
guffaw
a woman rushes into the vets holding a duck...the duck is very floppy and its eyes are closed....
"quick"cries the woman "my pet duck has collapsed"
shes rushed straight through to the examination room and a vet immediately comes in and goes to work........1 stethoscope examination later the vet looks sadly at the woman and tells her the duck has passed away.....
"NOOOOO" cries the woman " its the kids favourite pet duck....are you absolutely positive ....arent there more tests you could do to make certain......i mean....it could be in a coma...etc....etc...etc
the vet rolls his eyes and exits the room.....1 minute later he returns with a labrador dog....he takes off its lead and the labrador jumps up onto the table and sniffs the duck for a good 2 minutes....sits down...looks at the vet and shakes its head sadly....
the vet replaces the lead and takes the dog out of the room...he reenters and a cat enters with him....the cat jumps up and like the dog sniffs the duck for a good 2 minutes....sits down and looks at the vet....shaking its head sadly...
the vet lets the cat out of the room and says to the woman..."as i said mam your duck has passed away".....the woman laments the duck....expressing her worries over her childrens reactions.....the vet apologises but says that due to the "duck" emergency he now has a full waiting room...he asks the woman if he should post the bill to her...
the lady says that she would pay now and is presented with the bill.....
£250 QUID she yells....for telling me my ducks dead?????
no says the vet......that service was £12 ....you asked for further tests.......the rest is for the LAB REPORT and the CAT SCAN...........................
guffaw
ideas FB.....
1)make him live in lancashire for a month.....with happy cats directing him to his hotel
2) have him do his round dressed all in pink.....pink shoes are a must...
3)have him call the postmaster a very naughty boy (in a graham norton style accent)
4) have him present himself in manchester for a social night out in the village.......after being dressed by judy and bluexxx in whatever attire they deem suitable.
1)make him live in lancashire for a month.....with happy cats directing him to his hotel
2) have him do his round dressed all in pink.....pink shoes are a must...
3)have him call the postmaster a very naughty boy (in a graham norton style accent)
4) have him present himself in manchester for a social night out in the village.......after being dressed by judy and bluexxx in whatever attire they deem suitable.
!ACK!!!!
im lancasire through and through judy.....my dad had the red rose tattoed on my forehead at birth........but it got smudged in the wash....(mum and dads first washer ....instructions incomplete.....it read washing childrens clothes is easy.....but the s clothes is easy bit was missing....
hence the red smudge
but i cant go far wrong with you lot saying im ok....and as for the date....its gonna happen....unless you want to shy away from it at the last mihute :)....im not a poor man but may have to save up to take you out.....seeing as the back alley idea was met with a barrage of biblical proportions
speak soon :)
dargento
im lancasire through and through judy.....my dad had the red rose tattoed on my forehead at birth........but it got smudged in the wash....(mum and dads first washer ....instructions incomplete.....it read washing childrens clothes is easy.....but the s clothes is easy bit was missing....
hence the red smudge
but i cant go far wrong with you lot saying im ok....and as for the date....its gonna happen....unless you want to shy away from it at the last mihute :)....im not a poor man but may have to save up to take you out.....seeing as the back alley idea was met with a barrage of biblical proportions
speak soon :)
dargento
hmmm FB im not sure whether or not this test form postie stretches to grammatical pronunciation........
lets face it...if it does....you better get yer coat lol
mind you ....with mr FB there too ....and probably another 30 of us would come and support you ...it would probably just turn into another all out SH party lol....
<<<going back to check spellings again
lets face it...if it does....you better get yer coat lol
mind you ....with mr FB there too ....and probably another 30 of us would come and support you ...it would probably just turn into another all out SH party lol....
<<<going back to check spellings again
ops:GARLIC BREAD
GARRRLIC
BREAD
judy???
are we talking about the same woman here???
help me out here bluexxxx
is this the same judy that flogged me in public......the very same judy that broke her crop over your backside....hmmmmm
well louise i think you need to rethink your approach here......
well... im still waiting for my BJ but ive been told to keep her away from the JD and coke ????
now judy who could of said that??? :shock: :D :D :D :D :D :D
forever yours
dargento
GARRRLIC
BREAD
judy???
are we talking about the same woman here???
help me out here bluexxxx
is this the same judy that flogged me in public......the very same judy that broke her crop over your backside....hmmmmm
well louise i think you need to rethink your approach here......
well... im still waiting for my BJ but ive been told to keep her away from the JD and coke ????
now judy who could of said that??? :shock:
:D :D :D :D :D :D forever yours
dargento
yeah ES i can bounce.....but the veracity in which i go about that activity would largely depend on what it was i was bouncing on / in :shock: :shock: :shock:
and i would have you know bluexxx i completed a sponsored silence last year......ok well it wasnt so much of a sponsored silence as a 2 min silence.......well ok ok i admit i failed miserably after 11 seconds
and i would have you know bluexxx i completed a sponsored silence last year......ok well it wasnt so much of a sponsored silence as a 2 min silence.......well ok ok i admit i failed miserably after 11 seconds
ive had a great day at the speed awareness course .....
you know the ones....you get nicked for speeding then instead of getting 3 points and a 60 quid fine you pay 90 quid and get a driving lesson...
well im starting to believe some people from SH (the 1s who have met me and have said i talk a lot).....
the reason......the nice advanced driveing instructor was suffering form a nervous tic when we got back to our point of origin.... 20 minutes early and wanted the loo when i asked for his number to book myself on a course :)
he didnt return and i think he made a sharp exit....
and bluexxx i dont think ways of making me be quiet were ever going to be the topic of discussion lol... so uyou , mistress_sassy, Angel_chat,chairman81, and Judy could be right :)
heehee.....
.....you know the ones....you get nicked for speeding then instead of getting 3 points and a 60 quid fine you pay 90 quid and get a driving lesson...
well im starting to believe some people from SH (the 1s who have met me and have said i talk a lot).....
the reason......the nice advanced driveing instructor was suffering form a nervous tic when we got back to our point of origin.... 20 minutes early and wanted the loo when i asked for his number to book myself on a course :)
he didnt return and i think he made a sharp exit....
and bluexxx i dont think ways of making me be quiet were ever going to be the topic of discussion lol... so uyou , mistress_sassy, Angel_chat,chairman81, and Judy could be right :)
heehee.....
